Secrets of the City

From the St. Paul Saints web site: GARRISON KEILLOR MEET GARRISON SQUEALLOR,
SAINTS NEW FOUR-LEGGED MASCOT

ST. PAUL, MN From a distinguished radio host and writer to the new name for the St. Paul Saints four-legged mascot, Garrison Keillor will forever be immortalized in Saints lore as Garrison Squeallor was introduced as the new Saints mascot at the World’s Largest Game of Catch on Wednesday. I wonder if Keillor will be amused? Too bad they didn’t name the pig “A Prairie Hog Companion.”

Everyone’s favorite cheater waxes philosophical on the traditional, nuclear family. Yes, the same Garrison Keillor of three marriages and two children by different women. Let’s all consider ourselves fortunate that we have someone of such virtue to tell us how best to lead our own lives.

Today in Salon, local writer Jessica Nordell describes her behind-the-scenes experiences working as an extra on the Prairie Home Companion movie. While you read the article, ponder the following levels of meta: The movie itself is a “behind-the-scenes” account of the Prairie Home Companion broadcast; Jessica Nordell used to be a writer for the actual Prairie Home Companion show; and I suspect that she was the source of MNSpeak’s inside-the-set gossip during last summer’s production.

Garrison Keillor, Robert Altman, Kevin Kline, Lindsay Lohan, Virginia Madsen, John C Reilly, Meryl Streep and Lily Tomlin will be carried in horse drawn carriages led by the Highland Park Senior High marching band down Wabasha St. at about 6:10 or so. [movie trailer, official site]

Rex’s favorite litigant, I mean movie star, will open A Prairie Home Companion in St. Paul on May 3. Since most of us won’t be invited to ogle the stars inside the Fitz, can we come up with an appropriate MNspeak welcome for Garrison and the gang from our perches outside the red carpet?

Local media is abuzz with the news that Garrison Keillor has announced he is breaking away from his home at the Fitzgerald Theater (take your pick: Strib, Rake, PiPress, MPR, AP). Where’s he moving the show? Well, perhaps to downtown Minneapolis, but also maybe to… London? “I’d love to be in Edinburgh, London, Manchester, York,” said Keillor. “Any foreign country where they speak English.”

The illustrious C.J. finally tackles the big “Prairie Ho” controversy in today’s paper. MNSpeak had to follow an insightful exploration of a Fox News Anchor’s sexuality… but hey, we made the paper anyway.

After 14 years of underwriting, Land’s End is dropping Prairie Home Companion as a sponsor. We really must insist that you make no jokes about this matter — not even a snicker will be tolerated.

Harry Shearer’s weekly radio program did a parody of Garrison Keillor (and us), inspired by our little t-shirt fracas. Click here to hear the show, and fast-forward your RealPlayer to 31:00 to get to the segment. Shearer (who, not that you need reminding, is the voice of several Simpson’s characters including Smithers, Principal Skinner, and Ned Flanders — and was also Derek Smalls in Spinal Tap) is not broadcast on MPR in the Twin Cities, but is heard in most major markets around the country, plus Mankato, Austin, and Duluth. It’s funny!

Found on PHC’s shopping site: parody t-shirts anyone?