Local performance artist Patrick Scully thinks we should have the right to bare it all on Minnesota beaches. In his recent MPR column, he argues that, “For thousands of years we humans have removed our clothes to bathe naked in lakes and rivers.” And Scully practices what he preaches. He’s going to trial next week on charges related to swimming naked at a public park.

Patrick, it’s great that you’re comfortable with your naked body. However, we’re going to keep our pale selves hidden with swimwear this summer.