Secrets of the City

Nobody wakes up one morning and says, “I wanna bone a dead chick.” There was something these dudes were sticking it in that just didn’t work out for them anymore, and if necrophilia is your next move, that something was… what?

And even if you do wake up one morning and say, “I wanna bone a dead chick,” you don’t share it with two of your friends. You keep that one to yourself.

As a former resident of Wisco, I can explain away some of the odder stories coming out of the state, but this one is beyond belief.

“Armed with shovels, a crowbar and a box of condoms…”

Glad they were practicing safe sex.

Nobody wakes up one morning and says, “I wanna bone a dead chick.”

How do you explain all the guys willing to do a girl passed out drunk, or slipped a roofie?

At least they are warm…

ummm yeah….this thread can go away now! That would be just fine, please and thanks.

I don’t see the big deal here. This sort of thing is commonplace here in Arkansas. It’s not like the victim is going to complain about it. Everybody has their thing, though it’s not for me. I prefer Maine-Anjou cattle – something really special there.

I don’t see the big deal here. This sort of thing is commonplace here in Arkansas. It’s not like the victim is going to complain about it. Everybody has their thing, though it’s not for me. I prefer Maine-Anjou cattle – something really special there.

*splutters* LOL!

Just don’t go in for the sadistic bestial necrophilia, Frank. It’s just beating a dead horse.

Not that I endorse sex with the dead, but really, is it *that* bad in the scheme of things (besides the ick factor)? I mean, it’s not like the dead person’s going to know about it or anything.

As a side note, these stories are why I’m getting cremated.

Yes, it’s that bad in the scheme of things.

True Rat- Aside from the property damage, it is a victimless crime.

Please explain, Rat. Alie made her argument. I’d like to hear yours, because I can think of any number of things that are much worse in the scheme of things. Starting with garden variety assault of a live person.

Wait, not true Rat. I read your comments wrong.

Im with the Rat on this one.

Lets see to start with it’s not victimless crime – that woman probably had loved ones…loved ones that probably didn’t think…as they were lowering her body into the ground:

“Gee wouldn’t it be great if three hicks dugg her up and had a wicked zombie orgy with her lifeless body?”

Hey, I was just playing devil’s advocate here…

IDK, maybe I just have a different view of death than most people, but after you die, your body’s just a shell. It’s not really your loved one anymore.

That said, no, I wouldn’t want someone cavorting with my grandma’s corpse…that is, assuming they could drag all 600 pounds of her out of the ground.

Basically, I’m conflicted about the whole thing.

There are so many unanswered questions here. There is this:

The high court ruled Wisconsin law bans sex with dead bodies. A lower court earlier ruled nothing in state law banned necrophilia.

Ha-wha? And then why this woman? Did they know her? Did they just read about her in the news? And how did they concoct this scheme? I mean, it’s one thing for one person to be crazy, but it takes a special kind of crazy for three people to decide to break one of society’s most primal tattoos. And the condoms? WHAT? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

Couldn’t they just go have sex with a dead deer or something?

It is a property crime, not a person crime. I would be just as disturbed if someone has sex with my house as if someone had sex with my dead grandma.

…it is a victimless crime.

The family and friends of the decessed might argue differently, kc.

I mean, it’s not like the dead person’s going to know about it or anything.

So raping people in comas, or unconsious, or under a date-rape drug is okay, then, right?

Better let the defense lawyers handle this case, boys and girls. Walk away.

They pled guilty to sexual assault. That raises a whole host of other questions.

Max its called AIDs and it can be prevented by using protection….come on, get on board.

While were at it…can you show me a picture of society’s most primal tattoos…tell me its not one of those lame Ed Hardy numbers with the hearts and the snakes…

So raping people in comas, or unconsious, or under a date-rape drug is okay, then, right? Better let the defense lawyers handle this case, boys and girls. Walk away.

Well, to be fair, Bob, there is a difference between all that and dead. But I see your point.

So raping people in comas, or unconsious, or under a date-rape drug is okay, then, right?

You’re twisting my intent, Bob.  A dead person is NOT EVER going to know about it cuz they’re dead, so it’s not rape, it’s desecration of a human corpse.

Sheesh, I opened a can of worms I guess.

Haven’t you guys all seen “The Princess Bride”

Maybe she was just “mostly dead”?

I’d say you’re talking more a taboo than a tattoo, Max.

And, as the other people mentioned, what would the family of this poor woman have to endure had these Wisconsinites succeeded.

@msparber (i don’t care what your new name is, you’ll always be ms. parber to me)

They saw her picture in the news about her death. Apparently it got them jonesin’. I like the part about two of them being twins. Families that play together, stay together!

“I would be just as disturbed if someone has sex with my house as if someone had sex with my dead grandma.”

This is through the looking glass crazy.

“I would be just as disturbed if someone has sex with my house as if someone had sex with my dead grandma.”

Yeah, but you’re house was just asking for it kc…

/poor joke.

Yeah, what Bob said. The family and loved ones of the deceased are victims, in my opinion.

eff that sh*t Alie I am with you on the cremation.

Load up my ashes into a dozen shotgun shells, load those shells into a couple of over under 20 gauge beretta’s engraved with the monkeys from wizard of oz… get lit up on wild turkey and benzos and take my ass peacock hunting in Burma….That ought to keep some hicks from cheeseland from desecrating my dead body.

I want to start hanging out the ryanl.

Max: I like it….two birds with one stone….get those little bastards practicing both their tattoo skills and their spelling.

This is just the kind of ingenuity that we need to pick up the American economy.

Looks like the Grunke brothers are identical twins. Good thing that Nick has the Emo Phillips hairstyle going for him. Otherwise it would be tough to tell them apart.

Mb21: you like the Wizard of Oz too huh?

lol

So, let me get this straight… They don’t get the internet in Wisconsin?

Is Dustin related in any way to Brad?

This thread is starting to look like Fark. BTW, has anybody subbed this article there yet?

My Wisconsin posts are essentially Mnspeak’s miniFark.

That dead chick must have been really, really hot. That’s the only logical explanation

actually, dead chicks are usually quite cold. just what I’ve heard.

“Honey, the boys and I are stopping off for a cold one on the way home.”