Secrets of the City

Who waits until they’re 26 to go to a gay bar? That was one of the first type of bar/club that I went to when I first turned 21.

Oh, and stripper-mania is so 2007. It’s all about escorts now.

P.S. Wet Spot? Gross.

Has anyone actually verified his age? The quality seems more in line with a Junior High School Newspaper.

I bet their 14 year old male readers love it. So, success.

“But there’s one site out there that destroys all the rest — one that features thousands of singles looking for nothing more than an evening of hot, discrete banging (classy!). Of course, I’m talking about Craigslist.”

No shit, Sherlock. This reads like he went into a coma in 1999 and just woke up yesterday. I would find it more interesting if the story was about people who actually still trolled for casual sex in bars.

“This past week, my parents came to town for three days full of turkey, shopping and awkward conversations about the G.I.L.F doll my mom found in my bedroom closet.”

Yes, his mom flies across the country to dig in his bedroom closet. I’ll bet she knew she’d find the G.I.L.F. doll.

Wow. The 8th grade boy in me laughed out loud at this.

I bet he hooks up with that minx what thought an evening doing shots at Hooters was exploring the seemy underbelly of the city.

Would the seemy underbelly of the Twin Cities be Burnsville or Chaska?

I like to talk to the strippers about escorts.

I wish he would do a story on the Chuck E Cheese fight club. 

I SO want Ward Rubrecht to review the Wet Spot columns.

Looks like that big Chuck E. Cheese brawl was in Wisconsin.

I think the column would be a lot more successful if it was something besides an immature man running around discovering craigslist and sex world… come on, I did all that stuff my freshman year of college. There’s got to be more interesting stuff than that in the MPLS, right? How about a Smitten Kitten run? Or break out of the whole hetero male “oh my god, drag show, I’m man enough to admit I find a man in drag attractive” mindset?

City Pages has sucked hard for a long long time.

I’m not going to say it.

Lindsey,
Those are good ideas, but it still makes me sad that a sex “columnist” would want to fall back on the tired cliche’s of strip clubs and sex shops. I’m sure there is a lot more interesting sexual things going on in this city that we have no idea about (while not sexual, there is a nudist ranch just north of the cities) and you just know with all the sprawl in this town there’s some hot cul-de-sac swinging going on. This column is nothing more than trying to appeal to the young, inexperienced 16 to 20 crowd that still thinks interesting sex involves nothing more than a vibrator and grainy, ameteur internet porn.

I bet he hooks up with that minx what thought an evening doing shots at Hooters was exploring the seemy underbelly of the city.

He should be so lucky. She shares his insights, writing style, and she’s hot.

Wait. There’s more to interesting sex than a vibrator and grainy, amateur internet porn? Dang.

The really fun stuff isn’t being talked about and is certainly not going to show up in any column on any corporate site.

@Cat is Still Cat: Like I said elsewhere, Cat, I give good mark-up. Rrrrowwwrrr.

Cat, we’ll never be considered a major metro area until we get a Furry convention…

This will probably make up for the traffic they lost when Diablo Cody moved on.

There’s got to be more interesting stuff than that in the MPLS, right?

If by interesting you mean media risque, I hear there’s a felching party happening in the TC right now.

I had to google that, JACC, and now I’m being called into HR. Thanks.

Yeah, never mistake it for Lord Felchers.

I think felching is an urban legend.

Wasn’t “Felch” some kind of Chevy Chase movie?

Every time I go to the City Pages website, I notice how most, if not all, of the images Featured Stories at the very top of the page are pics of sexy ladies showing skin.

A story on a new nightclub opening: Cool pics of drinks or the lay-out of the club? Nope, sex image. Fashion show coverage: Great outfit? Catwalk full of models? Maybe, but only if it is the dirtiest sex image they can grab. The Wet Spot: sex image, always. Always Always Always.

City Pages cover more sex and fighting than the hey-day of Hard Copy.

They’ve still got some talented writers. They can still be funny, and edgy, and on-mark. They still cover serious issues from time to time. The music coverage is aplenty.

But gawd almighty the Editorial credo of “SEX AND VIOLENCE SELLS!!!!” is more than a little heavy-handed.

“I’m sure there is a lot more interesting sexual things going on in this city that we have no idea about…and you just know with all the sprawl in this town there’s some hot cul-de-sac swinging going on.”

Seriously, who could actually uncover something like that legally? Plus, do you really want to read a column in which your infidelity is being called out? His shit is funny, but censored because it has to be. It’s just about as inappropriate as you can get for an editorial column. You want dirty housewife stories? Watch a f***ing soap opera.

Swinging does not equal infidelity.