Secrets of the City

Hold up, Mom and Dad.

OMG, next she’ll be typing, “What’s up in the heezy, bitches!”

And the comments are surprisingly awesome.

This one is my fave:
She’s getting us ready for the Katherine Kersten / Michelle Bachmann lip lock sequel to the Madonna / Brittany MTV VMA event. I hope the networks’ coverage of the RNC is on 7 second delay, so they can bloop that out before the FCC fines them millions.

But to be fair, the GOP is confusing people as to what year it is by having a throwback convention with Zubaz and McCain and everything.

Earlier, KK brought us a column based on a couple articles she read in the Star Tribune (Sneaky Pete’s and Ultimate Fighting). Now she’s fired up Salon. com. What will she discover next?

I really think the Star Tribune has Kersten working there to make a mockery of Conservatives. There are clearly better writers out there, and clearly people who are thinking about more important and provocative topics than sexual antics that began 15 years ago and Muslims doing things she doesn’t like.

Has she written about people (even teens!) sending each other naked pictures on their cellphones yet? I’m trying to think of the next really obvious thing she’ll “discover.”

This trend is more than 15 years old: Marlene in Morocco.

To be fair: both her column and her newspaper are designed to be read by older people who aren’t techno-geniuses and who haven’t really been paying attention to pop culture.
And since everything old is new again, it makes sense she would mention it.
You want a send a message? Don’t read it.
Don’t bitch about it, don’t give it press. Just don’t read it. Because all this does is help show that columns like this generate buzz. Good work.

Yeah, I’ll even give her this: even though she’s about ten years too late, it’s reported pretty straight up. I didn’t know she did anything but editorials.

I’m more of a fan of Jill Sobule’s song by the same name from 1995. Of course, this may have something to do with Fabio’s appearance in the video. Who can resist that?

Jill Sobule’s one-hit wonder was also featured in a Subway commercial I produced in 1997.

They are coining terms such as “pansexual,

Wait a minute, I bought a pan at Target this morning. Did I miss something?

I’m trying to think of the next really obvious thing she’ll “discover.”

I’m waiting for her to “discover” that not all people born in the U.S. are white.

And that Hawaii is actually a state.

Wonder if she’d freak completely knowing that Puerto Rico is also part of the US … without being a state?

I’m trying to think of the next really obvious thing she’ll “discover.”

That there are a lot of interracial couples in MN?

I’m trying to think of the next really obvious thing she’ll “discover.”

That all of our beloved babushka-clad old ladies are really moonlighting as free-wheelin’ cafe society hussies?

That many of our nation’s waterfowl are also “experimenting” with rabbit-y lifestyles?

That swarthy, Italian moral-relativist liberals are sapping our nation’s parallel line resources by laying them on our decaying railroad infrastructure and asking hard-working Americans to believe they’re the same size?

God dammit, this nation is going to hell!

Andyst, your third link = page cannot be found.

But that’s the greatest outrage of them all!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ponzo_illusion

That’s the link. And good heavens, if God had intended parallel lines sitting on a railroad track to appear to be the same size, than He would have created them that way.

The Sturdevant is back!
I can now chuckle to myself in mirthful peace as I sit at my desk late at night and my wife wonders what the h*ck I’m doing.

I was in San Francisco. All that time with no MNSpeak! It was like I had no identity.

Um. You did have no identity.

But now you’re back! Go to town, Andy Sturdevant!

I was in SF last week and they had internet there. I was on MNspeak just fine. You lazy, lazy man.

Oh. I have one burning question for you, Andy.
Did you get your Double-Double?

Oh wait, perhaps you were at this place. in which case forgetting about the internet is understandable. Or visiting a place like this where you gotta try not to think about anything.

If what you say is true and the Californians do have the internet, then there’ll be no stopping them.

I did have a Double-Double! The whole thing was documented! My first In-N-Out Burger!

I initially, erroneously thought Jack in the Box was the same thing. I was walking with my friend and saw a Jack in the Box and I said “HOLY SHIT THAT’S JACK IN THE BOX! EVERYONE LOVES JACK IN THE BOX! IT’S SUPPOSEDLY THE GREATEST THING EVER! WE HAVE TO EAT THERE RIGHT NOW!” In all caps!

So I did and pretended I really, really enjoyed it until I realized later that I was thinking of something else entirely different. A worldly guy, that Andy Sturdevant.

Ach, Andy Andy Andy.

Some day, if you’re lucky, I’ll school you in the ways of the Californian (includes: the surfer lifestyle). But only if you promise to someday give me a tour of the Louisville Slugger plant.

Hey, turnabout my man. Turn a bout.

Dick Bremer and Telly Hughes had their first In-n-Out Burger in Anaheim the other day and loved it. I had it once with my family in Vegas and it rocked. We need that more than we needed Sonic, but not as much as we need Pizza Ranch and Hy-Vee.

Note: The California schooling also includes your choice) – From Van Halen to Huey Lewis, California music beyond the Beach Boys; Noir in le Soleil, favorite haunts of Raymond Chandler and James M. Cain; the L.A. artist, what does he eat for breakfast?; boiled orange pudding?! Or, is there a California cuisine; crackpots and crankcases, California inventors (includes, the Frisbee, the socket wrench, Jiffy Lube, and the microchip); and, of course, an entire seminar entitled Avocado 101: Appreciating the Testicle of the Gods.