Secrets of the City

As long as it is 100% Jar Jar Binks Free, I’ll attend.

If not, I’ll go to the Dark Side.

Like the classic trilogy by Lucas; hated the late 90s prequels.

I am secretly dying to go to this.

Is it science? Here’s Bill Murry singing Star Wars, so I’d say yes.

Watched “The Empire Stikes Back” on cable with my mom in Indianapolis last weekend. I remember when I first saw it, in a crowded 1st showing of hardcore Star Wars fans. When Vader said the famious line, everyone gasped. I probably did, too. I was so plesently surprised to see a sequel better than the original I loved.

I am SO going to this. With my nerdy ladyfriend.
Oh yes.

Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!! I am so excited for this I couldn’t avoid posting my squeal on MnSpeak!

Even with Jar Jar, it would totally be worth it just to jump to lightspeed in the Millennium Falcon.

What about Porn Wars?

Never saw it.

You are so cool for looking down on people who like Star Wars!
The answer to your question, of course, is that a lot of people care. That’s why ticket sales are blowin’ up like the Death Star.
It is my destiny to go see this exhibit.

This is going to get me flamed, but I really don’t understand why anyone over the age of, oh, about 14 actually pays attention to Star Wars, let alone gets all creamy-pantsed about it.

But good for the Science Museum for exploiting all this herd-thinking. Hopefully they won’t face the same fallout as the MIA did with it pandered to the crowd with Star Wars a few years ago. I’ve heard that exhibition caused much strife and stress on the MIA’s board…

I’ve heard that exhibition caused much strife and stress on the MIA’s board…

As disturbances in The Force are wont to do…

I really don’t understand why anyone over the age of, oh, about 14 actually pays attention to Star Wars

Maybe this would give us the answer

I think Amercans are distracted, dreamy people living in a Disney World land.

I wondered why that big mouse is talking to me in that squeaky voice.

I thought it was the acid, man…

That pretty much sums me up.

Yeah, did I mention the hat and the little mustache?

Yuck it up. You guys will be dreaming of Princess Leia when the Muslims slit our throat in the night.

Maybe this would give us the answer

Oh, man. That’s porn for a cranky old guy like me. Now you’re talking my language…

What are you talking about, rat? Muslims love star wars!

Muslims, Rat?

I take it back!
The Pub Weekly review of that book makes it sound absolutely reactionary and ridiculous and, well, boring.

Entertainment is the fault of 1960s counterculture? Bleah.
OK, maybe I can sit through Star Wars afterall (*though I’d rather read Rimbaud…) Sigh.

I think Amercans are distracted, dreamy people living in a Disney World land.

That makes no sense. There already is a Disneyland. And we all know about Disney World. So how can people be living in a Disney World land?

Did you mean Epcot? Or Westworld? Or WOW? Or Everquest? Or SIMS online.

Personally I think Americans are living in a Guitar Hero/American Idol/GTA4/Crystal Skull World of Tomorrow.

Wait. That’s already in Disney World.

My bad.

I just judge books by their cover.

Muslims, Rat?

That book Rat linked to seems to argue that our liberal approach to entertainment is some sort of Islamicization of the culture. Or something.

Ideologues are silly!

I suspect The Rat is actually making fun of that book.

With The Rat, it’s sometimes hard to tell.

I’m not so serious about the book. Just know it by name. Haven’t read it.

But the idea that the U.S. is a nation of Peter Pans? – Hell, yeah.

This guy? I think he’s pretty unique.

That learned his internet web page computer screen skills in 1996 and just held on for dear, sweet life.

That guy*

With The Rat, it’s sometimes hard to tell.

And yet this–”I think Amercans are distracted, dreamy people living in a Disney World land”–is so perceptive, and so true!

It’s true, I’m quite dreamy.

All you have to do is see life in a couple other countries and contrast it with Loosey Goosey Land.

Memorial Day weekend is probably a perfect example. A solemn day has been turned into a long weekend where we wear goofy splashy printed t-shirts and parking our plump asses in front of a barbecue grill and start bitching about the price of gas and how much it will cost to run our jetski this summer.

More proof that A Rat is Right.

Or St. Patrick’s Day. Used to be a perfectly good and solemnly joyous holiday. When the hell did it become a bachelorette party gone green? Beads and green beer and roving bus tours? What shite is that?!

What’s with all the cake and presents at birthdays?

My wife was in Paris for Bastille Day once. She said when the military parade went by, everyone went quiet. Parents hushed their children.

What happens on the Fourth of July?

What’s with all the cake and presents at birthdays?

Yeah, in Poland you just get vodka on your birthday. And maybe some flowers. And you like it!

Oh wait. You’re poking fun.

You obviously aren’t yet old enough to get disturbed at the new-fangled way they’re doing things nowadays…

I hush kids on July 4th. I scream out the window at them to shut the hell up pretty much every day, now that I think about it.

Beads and green beer and roving bus tours? What shite is that?!

What’s with these intellectually bankrupt non art lovers enjoying their lives!? They should be creating or appreciating art like I do, damn it!

My wife was in Paris for Bastille Day once. She said when the military parade went by, everyone went quiet

They felt they couldn’t make a sound or they French Army would surrender.

I usually don’t think anti-French jokes are very funny, but that was excellent.

What’s with these intellectually bankrupt non art lovers enjoying their lives!? They should be creating or appreciating art like I do, damn it!

OK, now you’re just going all wacky and off-topic.

But back to St. Patrick’s day. It used to be all about business–getting your ass good and drunk and then going home to knock up the missus (or whatever else was available).

Now it’s just, oh, about puking and making a scene–like much of American youth culture. But don’t take my word for it, this local guy’s blog post put it much better than I ever could.

I’ve given up on St. Pat’s. Besides, I go to Irish pubs all the time, and generally I enjoy them more when they are not full of Germans and Swedes dressed in green.

full of Germans and Swedes dressed in green

And not a single on of the blackguards are itching for a good fight!
(Ah, I miss the old days.)

*one of the blackguards…

(Slow down there, Fallon, me boyo.)

What happens on the Fourth of July?

In my hometown, everyone cracks their first beer/drink before 9am. If that’s not respect, nothing is.

My b-day is on St. Pat’s…I was sick of the green hoopla by age 12.

Cute.

I wonder why the U.S. military has a Generale, and a Colonel, even a Sergeant.

U.S. soldiers go on reconnaissance and establish bivouacs.

Bet they study Napoleon in War College.

We also ate eclairs at mess, chain smoked and loved Jerry Lewis, Rat.

Now it’s just, oh, about puking and making a scene–like much of American youth culture.

I’m not sure that’s a new aspect of St. Patrick’s Day or “American youth culture” or that large a component of either. But yea you’re right, St. Patrick’s Day turns into amateur hour, like Halloween or the day before Thanksgiving, which can be annoying.

At any rate, I’m going to go create a sculpture of broken Star Wars toys painted green to look like vomit and represent the lagging sophistication in today’s youth culture.

I think Lewis was pretty popular in the ’60s in France, but I don’t hear any French talking about him now.

But, equally baffling, Mickey Rourke is pretty popular.

Rouke? Gerald Depardieu, he aint.

My wife was in Paris for Bastille Day once. She said when the military parade went by, everyone went quiet.

Maybe your wife farted. Awk-ward!

All right, I let you guys talk a lot of smack on this site, and say nothing. But, seriously, you have gone too far.

DON’T TALK NO SHIT ABOUT MICKEY ROURKE.

I still say his best work was in “Body Heat.”

And then “Wild Orchid.”

At any rate, I’m going to go create a sculpture of broken Star Wars toys painted green to look like vomit and represent the lagging sophistication in today’s youth culture.

Now, see. That’s how culture happens! That’s what I’m talking about, said the hardworking art critic.

Oh wait. Were you being ironic again?

Damn you, Jim the ironic poster!

He’s making a comeback. He was superb in Once Upon a Time in Mexico.

Chevy Chase was interviewed once about a bedroom scene that he had to do. As an actor he said everyone dislikes shooting those scenes, except Mickey Rourke.

Max has a man-crush on The Motorcycle Boy.

Motorcycle Boy Lives!

I’ll never forget that image of Rourke training to be a boxer, hoisting liter bottles of Evian.

Rourke was pretty good in an informercial I saw last week at 3 a.m., selling time-shares in Haiti.

I bought two. It was the least I could do for The Motorcycle Boy.

Even the most primitive of societies have an innate respect for the insane.

That’s why Mnspeak.com has been nominated for so many national awards.

*rimshot!*

Remember when Memorial Day was more than sitting at your computer debating this crap?

Compelling observation, Larry. But seeing that this is not really Memorial Day do you think it’s appropriate?

Yeah, the day before Memorial Day is the appropriate day for remembering those who died on Alderaan, and the heroic pilots of the Rebellion’s near-suicidal attack on the Death Star. Not to mention those who risked all to save us on Hoth.

I just hope people will follow the honorable tradition of Memorial Day, which is complaining that nobody respects the real meaning of Memorial Day.

I will do what I always do on Memorial Day. Go in to work and stay there for about an hour, until I figure out why nobody else is there.

I’ll probably do half a day of work tomorrow, because for most of the people I work with, it’s not a holiday

I feel for A Rat. Even Cancer Merchants deserve a day off.

I will do what I always do on Memorial Day. Go in to work and stay there for about an hour, until I figure out why nobody else is there.

Oh yeah. Like you go to a real office, Max. Tch! An Asian Massage parlor hardly counts as an office!

I’ll be nursing a wicked sunburn obtained from Soundset on Memorial Day. Damn Minnesota weather and its fickle sunshine!!!!

It’s kind of an office in the way that the Fonz on Happy Days had an “office.”