Secrets of the City

Let the wikipedia reflect that it was me, this morning, that invented the bacon roll.

But LOL bacon, I am sad to report, has been done.

Well, I know what I’m getting Alie for Christmas.

that pic is evidence enough for me that a true bacon cheeseburger should forgo the bun for two slabs of weaved bacon.

Cook the burger 3/4’s of the way then toothpic the bacon around said burger and drop in deep fryer.

Remove from fryer…wrap in newspaper/paper towel and serve with assorted dippin sauces.

but alas Kurtis the true “bacon roll” was invented long ago by an aquaintance, it goes as follows:

Go to any movie that doesn’t star Kevin Bacon (tough I know) at any theatre, preferabbly one with an older audience. Wait till the theatre is mostly full, ideally old lutheran women. Just as the opening credits are about to roll….loudly proclaim to your freinds:

“I heard Kevin Bacon is excellent in this”

Watch in amazement as everyone begins to whisper…didja know this movie had kevin bacon in it.

I have a freind that does this every single time I see a movie with him, honestly it never gets old…give it a shot!

Kurtis: Ah yes, the 1980s. The era in which, if you were young and had the right level of intensity, you could shatter glass just by yelling.

Intensitah!!!

Hmm, that was a bit disappointing. What they SHOULD have done was to fashion bacon cups, then attach strips of cooked bacon to the cups. Then the whole thing could have been eaten off. I mean, really…raw bacon? Cooked bacon is way hotter.

i would think with a amply busty statue and a turkey deep fryer that could be rectified?

Esquared, you could find something to criticize about the Sistine Chapel roof.

Hah, shit. Don’t even get me started on the Vatican.

I got rick roll’d at transmission wednesday night.

I went outside for a smoke and when I came back in …

NEVER GONNA LET YOU GO! NEVER GONNA SAAAAAY GOODBYYEEE!

also that may be the first IRL rick rolling ever.

Mmmm… I have a delicious recipe for bacon rolls that I posted a couple of years ago.

In the near-future, Rick Astley’s face will be the face of Big Brother.

Oh, and damn your eyes, Jeremy. Damn you too, in fact. And your eyes. Damn all three of you, if you and each eye should be considered a separate entity viz. being damned.

and last night I bought a hookah from the holy land

and it was awwwwwwwwwwwwwwsome.

I would like to offer a second damnation for Jeremy and his eyes!

Mwah ha haaaaa!!!!!

My beloved pal EE is right. Raw bacon is problematic. Has our collective love for bacon so blinded us to the importance of a real critical dialogue? I’d go so far as to say, in fact, that the bacon bra is straight-up baconsploitation.

“also that may be the first IRL rick rolling ever.”

There was the RL rick rolls outside the “churches” of Scientology a few weeks ago.

On the one hand, that raw bacon bra fits well, thanks to the malleability of uncooked fat, but I’m with whoever suggested the COOKED bacon bra.

On an unrelated note, I’ll be at a Mini Lebowski bowling party tonight! Am supposed to go in costume, so unless I come up with something better, I’ll bring a cowboy hat and go as The Stranger, or paint my toenails green, wear something extra hot and go as Bunny Lebowski.

and last night I bought a hookah from the holy land and it was awwwwwwwwwwwwwwsome.

Put this in your water pipe and smoke it, wayne.

A question for anyone who has been to Fago De Chao:

I like meat, but I don’t LOVE meat. Should I get just the salad bar, or is the extra cost really worth the whole AYCE meat experience?

Naked bacon dining replaces naked sushi at Temple?
Too soon?

Saloth, if you’re out there: Made your Pecan Soup this past weekend on the ski trip – everyone raved – it was awesome – thanks!

Oh my stars, a formula for determining the proper crunchiness of your bacon.

Oooh, doesn’t Fogo De Chao have lovely bacon wrapped treats?

kc: From what I hear, it’s prolly not something you would enjoy if you’re not a meat fan, but I won’t steer you one way or another.

I know, lame.

Smoking Bans Increase Drunk Driving

KC, get the whole package. i think it’s $40. you can try little bites of any meat, and you get the salad bar.
And those little cheese popovers, holy F**k.

oh and you don’t have to love meat. my girlfriend likes it but isn’t a meat freak like me and my brother, but she enjoyed the variety of meatz.

oh bob, always harshing my fruity-flavoured mellow.

anyway my hookah is for private use, so you keep your damn dirty moustache out of my home!

ok, I’m just jealous of your stache. Still. And I have a beard now.

I went to a brasillian restaurant in boston that was a pay-by-the-pound buffet with a bunch of awesome spinning meats they’d carve from.

and of course they had guarana soda there, so I was happy.

I heard that baker’s girlfriend loves the meat.

That oped left a bad taste in my mouth. Bob, do you really see smoking as an issue of morals?

What you’re describing is a churrascaria, wayno.

And Guarana soda is the bomb. So is Antarctica beer.

/used to live in Brasilia

KC: If this trend is driven by smokers seeking places to drink and smoke, as the study’s authors contend, couldn’t the headline had read “Smoking Increases Drunk Driving?”

Or perhaps it is non-smokers who are doing the drunk driving, on the road looking for a nice, healthy, smokefree binge drinking experience. Unless they interview those arrested for DUI to find out a) do you smoke? b) are you driving further to smoke at a bar? and c) are they telling the truth? (verify the information), the study only spotlights a troubling statistic — not a root cause.

In any case, we will going to see Iowa (came close this year, but no –ahem–cigar) and Wisconsin going smokefree statewide in the near future, so it will be a moot point.

Ick: It was a Letter to the Editor, and was not about the smoking ban, but in response to an earlier article on hookas that including an interview with businessman Mohammed Aasar who decided not to open a hooka bar near the U of M campus. He (not I) said it was morally wrong to sell a product that many users believe — wrongly — is a safe or “healthier” way to smoke tobacco.

I just wanted to give Mr. A. a well-deserved kudo for his decission and a slap to the Minnesota Daily for running over to Sue Jeffers for her opinion on every smoking-related story they ran.

and at the other end of the ethical and moral spectrum, is Sue Jeffers, owner of Stub and Herbs

So it was Mr. A and not you implying that Sue Jeffers is somehow less than moral for her views on smoking?

ah yes, thank you kurtis. I knew there was a name but I didn’t want to fuck it up or look it up right now (work work work!)

anyway they have a national diet I could easily roll with. it’s simple (so I could do it) yet so damned tasty.

A Brazilian friend of mine said you can get Guarana at an int’l grocery in town – anyone know which one that is?

I want acaraje most of all, but a moqueca would be good too.

yeah I pick it up at the galapagos market sometimes (Hennepin E/Central). I’m sure there are other places too, but that’s my local one.

Sue Jeffers sold S&H’s. I guess she was having a hard time getting college kids to drink beer.

“yeah I pick it up at the galapagos market sometimes (Hennepin E/Central)”

That’s even on my way home… I’ll have to drop by and check it out.

I just asked my boss, by email, for the afternoon off.

Fingers crossed…

I’m leaving at 12:15. Ya’ll can suck it!

Actually, I’m spring cleaning, so it’s not like I’ll be doing anything fun…

So it was Mr. A and not you implying that Sue Jeffers is somehow less than moral for her views on smoking?

No, that’s me. Not for her views, mind you, but how she supports her position with exagerations and blatent falsehoods, even when testifying before lawmakers and speaking to reporters. Want to support smoking, fine — we agree to disagree. Lie to reporters and lawmakers to make your point? Less than moral in my book.

Sue Jeffers sold S&H’s.

And made a tidy profit, according to Sweet Sue herself. She not only owned the bar, but the building. She is now the mouthpiece for a fringe group of bar owners still swinging at smoke and who don’t play well with the MLBA, the industry’s main lobby group.

alie how is your ankle?

It’s actually fine now, so I basically have 20 percocets to do whatever I want with…

If the question is one of morality, well, then leave that up to God. But more than one religious organization has made the case that smoking is a sin.

Must be that kind of day. I’m taking off at 3pm. We’re going to the airport to greet our friends who are bringing home their new daughter from Guatemala. Exciting!

I’m not a religious person, but if harming yourself and the people around you isn’t a moral issue, I don’t know what is.

@aliecat: Oh, to have the afternoon off and a surplus of prescription meds…

yall are probably members but I just found this group on flickr
http://www.flickr.com/groups/everythingsbetterwithbacon/pool/

after seeing this awesome photo
http://www.flickr.com/photos/chrys/2329243533/

which combines two things I love, bacon and drupal

Question: When was the last time anyone read a biography (or any book), and realized that the author was telling YOUR story? (and no. “Catcher in the Rye” doesn’t count).

Because 90% of the first two chapters of this have had that effect on me.

When was the last time anyone read a biography (or any book), and realized that the author was telling YOUR story?

Well, there’s this, but it actually seems to be wrong on almost every detail.

does Dianetics count?

Kurtis- yeah, but I’m not so hip to recreationally using drugs…I’m square that way.

When was the last time anyone read a biography (or any book), and realized that the author was telling YOUR story?

Notes from the underground?

I was kidding Alie.

Oh, and for biographies, not sure I’ve ever read one that hit home, but this video is the closest any artist has come to reflecting my life exactly as it is.

(Not a Rick Roll)

Oh I know, kurtis…just had to put that out there in case my mom reads this.

OK. I got your email, too, BTW. I’ll see you at six for the Vodka & Perk party!

(Just kidding, Alie’s mom.)

The Sneetches?

wait are you really having a VP party?

I’m so up for it.

No. No I’m not. And I’m not collecting a $12 cover charge, either.

Kurtis,

I watched that while listening to the new Beck album and I thought for sure the meows were in the song.

where is this really definitely totally not happening at?

yesterdays story about the dog biter is on boing boing now.

A big drug party is just what my apartment building needs…/sarc

Perhaps you need to post something on Facebook about this totally fictional VP party. I hear it is all the rage with underage drinking parties…

Facebook invite will read:

Come to my fictional VP Party! Drugs and booze will not be consumed, but bring $12 anyway because I need to get my “boyfriend” out of jail.

Smoking bans kill, says study

“Fatal accidents involving alcohol increased after communities banned public smoking, the study to be released by the Journal of Public Economics found. The authors attributed the increase to people driving farther to drink, either to a place with an outdoor smoking area or a city without a ban.”

Ohhhh, but my clothes aren’t all thmellly

“Smoking bans kill, says study”

The real headline is almost as stupid as your joke headline: “Banning smoking increases drunken driving”

What increases drunken driving is drunken assholes driving more often. Their motives are completely irrelevant.

All they wanted was to have a cigarette and be left alone.

Now, they’re dead.

All they wanted to do is get shitfaced while smoking, but it had to be in public, and they had to drive forty miles to do it.

Now a family of four who happened to be on the same road is dead.

But drunk drivers don’t kill people. Public health initiatives kill people.

Looks to me like a case of drunk drivers AND public health initiatives.

But my shirt doesn’t smell anymore.

Nope. Just drunk drivers. Where they’re going and why is irrelevant. THEY DON’T NEED TO BE DRUNK WHEN THEY GO!

Oops. Accidentally hit caps lock.

Wait… it The Rat for real? He’s like a joke character, right?

Said the man who posted video of a cat licking his head…..

Speaking of cats. I love Laser Cats.

Laser Cats made me uncomfortable. Mainly because I think my cat, Jonathan, has been trying to kill me in my sleep. I often wake up to find him staring at me and sometimes he attempts to cover my mouth with his paw. Laser Cats might have given him some crazy ideas and I don’t like that one bit, dammit.