Secrets of the City

When I lived abroad, other Americans were absolutely blown away that I planned to return to Minneapolis; they thought that since I’d already uprooted myself, I would take the momentum and move somewhere “worthwhile” in America. Also, the amount of people who shouted “FARGO, YOU BET, DON’CHA KNOW!” in reaction to the phrase “I’m from Minnesota” was kind of unnerving.

When I would travel out of Sioux Falls to larger cities, people were shocked, SHOCKED, that I’ve never seen a cow up close. I guess they assume all people that live in the midwest are farmers.

When I moved to California in the early ’00s, I learned people’s main referents were Prairie Home Companion, Prince and the MOA.

People have asked me with a straight face if there are any black people here. I guess they listen to too much Chris Rock.

wow…I thought you’d have the tech-literate cognoscenti in Austin. Perhaps you ought to put it in language they will more easily understand. Just tell them that we’re like the Velvet Underground of cities. Everyone is doing stuff based on our influence, but the true intrinsic genius of our works won’t be recognized for quite some time.

Being from Iowa, when traveling to the coasts it is surprising how many people confuse Iowa with Idaho. (Not many potatoes are grown in Iowa…)

kc, I’ve gotten that one too…that one pisses me off the most.

Of course, I always have reverse snobbery/ignorance about other cities like NYC, LA, and Paris…so there ya go…

When swimming in an outdoor hotel pool in California on a 60-degree day, total strangers guessed correctly that I was from Iowa.

People have asked me with a straight face if there are any black people here.

When confronted with this question, the best I can muster is “yes…most of the Timberwolves and half of the Vikings”

At the fairly elite east coast college I attended in the late 1980s/early 1990s, I encountered people who thought Minneapolis was a state and at least one person who thought Minnesota was next to Oklahoma.

When swimming in an outdoor hotel pool in California on a 60-degree day, total strangers guessed correctly that I was from Iowa.

swimming on 60 degree day = Midwestener
Farmer’s tan = Iowan

Do you still think the public schools are doing a good job and deserve more money, vlado?

About 5 years ago in the south of france, after telling several french citizens I was from Minneapolis (and receiving confused stares), and getting sneers when I said I was from America, I just gave up and said I was from Canada…close enough IMO.

Places that friends and family not living in Minneapolis think I live:

- Indianapolis
- Milwaukee
- Michigan
- Minnesota [city]
- An unnamed metropolitan area on an undetermined Great Lake
- Somewhere that is not Broolyn for some reason [Brooklyn only]
- The Mitchell Corn Palace
- And of course, the dreaded six-syllable “Minneanapolis”

When I was traveling in South America and said I was from the US, the majority of locals asked whether I was from NY or California, and had no clue where MN was. But there were a handful of people who, when I told them where Minnesota is, would immediately light up and start talking to me about either Wellstone or Prince. Something musta worked cause I never once got shit about American politics. Oddly (?) I found the French there had a very good grasp on a lot of Minnesotan aspects (maybe has something to do with the fact that there are a good amount of ex-pats here for whatever reason). The majority of real ignorance came from other Americans though, sadly. Mostly of the #6 variety.

As far as #2 goes- does the inquirer want life to go by that much more quickly?

Hey, there’s “More To Life” here, isn’t there?

Nothing more crushing to us than realizing we really are just fly over tundra with an identity complex.

Oh, I forgot one, when I lived in SD, most people would respond with “oh, where Mount Rushmore is, right?” “Is Sioux Falls near Mt Rushmore?” Not really offensive, per se, but it gets annoying after a while.

I do NOT have a farmer’s tan. I want that known.

Of course not, Kevs. It’s March, after all.

“Is Sioux Falls near Mt Rushmore?”

Well tell us. Is it?

Har…

Most of my family has visited here at least once from Michigan. So, it still amazes me when I speak to them on the phone that the first question is “How cold is it?”… I respond… “Oh my god, I couldn’t live there”.

What??? You live in MICHIGAN. Not that different Aunt Sandy.

This is, for me, one of the last words on non-Minnesotan ignorance about our homeland, from Dara Moskowitz’s 1998 Jucy Lucy round-up in City Pages.

“We’re lucky the sun doesn’t set all summer, since it makes it easier to shoot the roving packs of timber wolves and polar bears that daily raid our trash barrels. Primary industries? Cod fishing, lace tatting, ice chipping–come to the land that time forgot!”

I did a summer internship in Boston while I was in graduate school at the University of Montana and my roommate randomly said to me “I really want to visit the midwest some day.”
I assumed he said this because I’m from MN, and I said “Really? The Midwest? I don’t hear that a lot.”
He added “Well, I hear Montana is really pretty.”
Shiiiit.

I got a lot of (good-hearted) shit for being from MN at my East Coast private college. I always LOVED it when people said things about going back to Fargo or being from Fargo because then I could respond: “that’s in North Dakota, you jackass, try learning geography sometime.”

Ok, I’ll give you that. But know that I specifically spend time in the summer building an even tan. You can verify this by catching me at Lake Calhoun on any number of days.

Lots of white guys who never get laid in the photo w/the link.

When I lived in Milwaukee, people from the East Coast thought that was Minnesota. “You a Vikings fan?” asked one guy during my internship at ABC News in NY.

When I lived in the Quad Cities (davenport, Iowa), people thought I was in the Twin Cities. “Quad is not the same as Twin. 4 does not equal 2.”

Now that I’m here, most of those people have forgotten about me.

When travelling I usually have to say “It’s not too far from Chicago” or “It’s where Prince is from.”

When in other countries I usually just tell people I leave near Chicago. That or Canada, depending on who I’m talking to.

And in national news, I took an NYCer around a couple of times when he was here on business, and the man was utterly ASTOUNDED at how great Minneapolis appeared to him. It was fun to watch his reactions to the parks, lakes, creeks, theaters, superheros in electric egg-mobiles delivering pizza, etc.

Jinx @ Paulie!

I think we can’t stop asking for our “due respect” until our local yokels stop saying “Eye-talian”. I just tell people I’m originally from Detroit (with a sneer), but I migrated to East Dakota for the blonde women.

I always told people that Minnesota was on the top in the middle.

I went to school is MA. A girl who scored a perfect score on the SAT couldn’t find MN on a map. First she thought it was Michigan, then she pointed to Kansas, then Wisconsin. Eventually, she just goes, “those midwesterns states are hard!”

Also, I thought I could get away with going “I’m from Minneapolis” one time, a large group of (supposedly) smart students go,
“Indiana”
B: No
“Michigan”
B: No
Um…
B: It’s in MN
“Huh.”

Also, no one believed that there were other black people in MN besides me, so several people wanted to meet my family during parents weekend.

Finally, I’ve been told several times that I don’t sound like the movie Fargo.

Oh, I could go on…

“those midwesterns states are hard!”

I felt that way about the East Coast. All those stupid tiny states. It should take you the better part of a day to get across a whole state, not an hour.

I just tell people I’m originally from Detroit (with a sneer)

Whenever I say I’m from Michigan, the first question is about how bad Detroit is. I respond back that it is that bad which is why I haven’t been there since I was 6 (with a sneer)

Eye-talian might be bad, but hearing my mother say Minny-tonka is worse.

We talk a big game about no one knowing where we are, but do we know where they are?

Try this

Ranty–me too, exactly! I lived in France for a couple of years, and I learned quickly if they stared blankly at “Minneapolis” I said it was near Chicago, or “in the middle of the US, up north near Canada.” Once as joke I said “It is between LA and NY,” and that was accepted without further questioning!

I also learned they get Minneapolis confused with Indianapolis. Frankly, I can see why from France those two cities would de hard to distinguish. If they said “zoum zoum” referring to the Indy 500, I just smiled and nodded.

86% right with 33 mile incorrect average

I’ve lived in Mexico, Pennsylvania and North Carolina. Everybody in Mexico figured we were part of Chicago. Everyone else thought all the BS that Garrison Keillor spews about the weather and people was true.

“No. No, I’m not a Norwegian Bachelor Farmer.”

Funny you talk about mispronouncing Italian and also mention Detroit in the same post. DAY-TWA!

I also say at the top, in the middle.

A few years ago, in MplsSt.Paul mag, the editor wrote a column about the DNC coming to visit to assess our viability as a convention location. According to that article, the only reason they came is because a young Kerry campaigner, who was stationed here during the 2004 campaign, convinced the bigwigs that this was a great place with big buildings.

I take the blame.

I like to reinforce misconceptions about Mn when I travel.

When in Seattle a few years back I reinforced the idea that Mn didn’t have highways, was mostly dirt roads, and most families still had wagons.

Also, many of our towns are so small that there aren’t enough girls and boys have to take boys to the prom.

“Did you take a boy to the prom?”

“Ofcourse, everyone did.”

I’m not kidding. These conversations actually happened.

90%, average error of 27 miles – whoo! (those itty-bitty east coast states got me a bit)

In fairness, we all have tunnel vision–we’re all living in our own caves despite how connected we portend to be. How many of us can say something about Detroit, St. Louis, Dallas, Louisville, Indianapolis (etc.) that doesn’t sound closed-minded and moronic?

92% – 11 miles avg mistake

Just don’t ask me for state capitols!

90% 15 mile error 192 seconds.

I can say a lot about Detroit and St. Louis that might sound closed minded and moronic, but it’s from first-hand knowledge, and they would both deserve it.

94%, 8 miles of error. Memorizing all the states and state capitals in 7th grade social studies continues to pay off.

So why is this misunderstanding a problem? I don’t know jack about the cities in Ohio or New Jersey. So what. Who cares if people can’t keep Mpls and St. Paul straight. Why is it important to you that these people are aware of these facts.

You really don’t know anything about Jersey or Ohio?

I know something about all the states, at least where they are, what their political leinings are, and either a food that’s popular or a band.

Minneindianopolis.

Probably the most creative pronunciation I heard while living overseas. Yes, we are often confused with the Home of the Brickyard.

Also encountered once or twice:

“Where are you from?”

“Minnesota.”

“Minnesota? What state is that in?”

Funny thing, though, is that more people overseas recognize the name “Honeywell” than they do “Minneapolis.”

94% 14 miles 403 seconds (the missus helped, though)

Hey guys – hate to say it, but moving here from NY I’ve gotten the same kind of misinformed comments that I once made about your fine cities prior to moving here. So maybe it’s universal, huh?

“I don’t know jack about the cities in Ohio or New Jersey.”

You don’t listen to Springsteen?

“My sweet cherry, I’m sinkin’ down/here darlin’ in Youngstown.”

“New Jersey in the mornin’ like a lunar landscape.”

Just to dovetail between swimming in an outdoor pool and SXSW, I was one of about three people to make their way out for a sunset swim in Barton Springs pool yesterday. It was fun for about a quarter lap, but:

A) The water is warmish, but not a hot tub.
B) With weather not unlike ours in May, the pleasantness eventually gives way to numbness.
C) I’m not a very good swimmer.

Non-air travel around the country (and beyond) sure helps you know the geography and the peoples – if you make the effort.

We get funny cruise photos from Lori’s parents that all look the same. On the back it says “Guatemala” or “Bahamas” but they’re the same photos: Mom’s smiling head, a palm tree, and a huge ship. Or – mom’s smiling head, a bunch of old white people in sunglasses, in a sanctioned tourist village.

Most of us are a little ignorant to some degree, but what’s unfortunate is people consciously choosing to live in a monochromatic bubble.

94% with a 6-mile avg. error in 352 seconds. (Hey, I was at work.)

What??? You live in MICHIGAN. Not that different Aunt Sandy.

Are we cousins? Never mind, couldn’t be. I don’t actually talk to my Aunt Sandy on the phone.

It is a lot colder here for a sustained period of time in the middle of the winter. Maybe it depends on what part of Michigan is your reference point. I’d imagine folks from Houghton would respond differently than folks from Detroit.

I’ve found it makes a difference if I say “I’m from Minneapolis” vs “I’m from Minnesota.” I haven’t gotten nearly the number of clueless questions y’all seem to have gotten, but I usually answer the “Are there any black people in Minnesota?” question with a no.

Are we cousins?

Oddly enough I discovered I do have a cousin out here completely by random at a Starbucks 3 years ago.

94%, 6 mile avg., 314 seconds

And I got West Virginia right off the bat, only 38 miles off with no borders to match it with.

86% 36 mile average, 411 seconds

When the bridge collapsed, a lot of online friends at a message board asked if I was ok. I told them all was well, and then they of course had to add in “I didn’t think there were bridges that big in Minnesota!”