Secrets of the City

I’d rather have a dump truck, too.

Every craigslist ad has an untold story of heartache and pain.

Wow, kurtis. I think I’ll now refer to “doin’ it like snails.”

I wonder who dumped whom?

He’s a practical guy. He’s probably the dumpee.

Definitely the dumpee… You don’t buy a ring, and THEN dump the girl. You gotta love a Christmas breakup!

I just assumed since he wants a dump truck, he has some dumping to do!

I was thinking he bought the ring, held on to it for a bit, and then discovered she was cheating or something.

It’s fun to make up scenarios about total strangers!

thumbs down on Girl Friday’s music and restaurant picks. she’s regressing.

Maybe he gave her the ring, she accepted then ran into a old high school flame at the Chaska Production of The Pajama Game. He didn’t want go see the pajama game because the Wild were playing the Flames on HDNET and he wanted to try out the new Sony HDTV that he just bought at Best Buy.

One thing led to another and she returned the ring and will marry her old High School flame in an April Wedding at the Minnesota Arboretum. Please no gifts, contributions to the bridge fund would be nice.

Is anyone else concerned that he would also consider a trade for a revolver?

…Binky? Is everything okay at home?

I find it interesting that cash was so far down on the list. He’ll take all of these things, but he’ll take cash if he has to.

And Thanks Simpleton for dragging up the memory of my last breakup! At least the Wild won…

I wonder if he sold his snowmobile to buy the ring for that cheating bitch…heh.

Not only the snowmobile, but the trailer too? She’s a whore.

No kidding, while he’s out working hard to take her to nice dinners at The Outback Steakhouse every Saturday night, she’s out slutting it up at Majors or The Rock with her friends…no wonder he dumped her. He deserves a woman that’ll cook him up a nice pot roast and watch the Vikings game with…

Maybe she did like to watch the Vikings games and he liked to watch the Packers. Hence the “yellowish” color of her diamond. Maybe it was the last straw in his overbearing Packer ways.

Walter: “I did not watch my buddies die face down in the mud so this fucking whore…”

Dude: “Walter this is not Vietnam!”.

Walter: “Well, there is a literal connection.”

Calmer than you, Dude.

No kidding, while he’s out working hard to take her to nice dinners at The Outback Steakhouse every Saturday night, she’s out slutting it up at Majors or The Rock with her friends…no wonder he dumped her. He deserves a woman that’ll cook him up a nice pot roast and watch the Vikings game with…

Whoops, double post…

Now you’re an attention whore Alie.

I kid, I kid.

The whole Craigslist post sounds straight out of Beautiful Girls.

Who wants to copy/paste it since the big, bad websense babysitter won’t let me see?

I have a huge 1 and 1/2 carat “champagne”(yellowish) diamond solitaire ring, 14K gold band that I no longer have any use for. Will trade (or sell for $2000) for a decent plow and/or dump truck. Or hunting rifles / magnum revolvers, or Polaris 4-wheeler. Any reasonable offers welcome. Serious replies only please.

heh

Awesome.

I’m thinking she dumped him because he didn’t have a decent plow and/or dump truck, or hunting rifles / magnum revolvers, or Polaris 4-wheeler…

Hmmmmmm… locomotor phallic symbols, *magnum* only…

I bet he’d also consider a Stihl with a 36″ bar, a jackhammer, or maybe even a purebred wirehair pointer pup.

SE Metro? This looks like Anoka County heartache to me.

I suspect dude will be much happier with a dump truck than with her.

Is anyone else concerned that he would also consider a trade for a revolver?

…Binky? Is everything okay at home?

Nothing wrong here.

Two things…

First, I’ve already got my .357 magnum. Nothing too special.

Second, I’ve oftentimes said that even the most benign conversation with a woman, no matter how innocent it starts out, is like a walk through a mine-field. You can be meanandering along without a care in the world, looking at the clouds and the trees when all of the sudden you take one wrong step and *CLICK*. That click is the change in the womans tone… however subtle it might be, it means that something that has been buried for 20 years, something you thought was harmless or you had forgotten about all together is ready to ruin your day and potentially take your balls off.

I know it’s totally random, I just really like that analogy.