Secrets of the City

It’s hard for men in this culture, she said, to come forward and admit physical abuse.

Apparently, unless, of course, you can use it to discredit your wife’s case…

This is no laughing matter! So much for gender equality when men can’t be victims too!

Enough is enough!

…and Ms. Clark is not above those tactics to win a case.

Let’s also not forget that men can be raped too.

Ummm…I wasn’t arguing that, I was just noticing that the timing was a little too convenient…christ…

Hmmm… Is it possible that we’re going to have a real conversation about this, or not so much?

I’m thinking, no, as well…

aliecat said all there is to say in the first comment. we ought to just let this one die right here.

if you guys didn’t note the dripping sarcasm, I don’t know if there’s much I can do.

That’s perhaps a good thing, but this thread could easily result in a horrible amalgamation of too much gin, late night posting, and a story of a dark, dark moment of my life…

In fact, kill men and learn how to reproduce without them! All they’ll ever do is repress us with words and glances once we make it illegal to do anything else! It will never end!

A sarcasm font would be wildly useful.

You betta recognize…

I didn’t know Victoria Williams could pack such a punch!

He’s going to have to prove abuse. If he doesn’t have any physical evidence of said abuse, then he won’t get very far. IE hospital records, photos, etc.

Without knowing what independent verification there is for either of their stories, there’s not a lot that can be said. I would guess that his wife has reasonable evidence for her charges, as this has reached the court. Who knows, though?

Why is it so hard to believe a man can be battered or abused as women are at times. Abuse can be verbal as well as physical. Granted physical abuse would be more valuable in his case, especailly if he had pictures, police reports, and hospital records to prove he was being abused.

There are just as many bad women as there are men. Men just don’t want anybody to know their wife or girl friend kicked the crap out of them. Abuse doesn’t know any gender. It just needs to end. Nobody male or female deserves to be beat up, or verbally abused by anyone. Historically women have had more support groups for this, but there are a lot of men out there that also need some help with these matters.

Joe, I’m with you that abuse can go both ways in a relationship, but I’m also with Alie on the somewhat suspicious timing of the announcement of this abuse in particular. Women can and do hit their significant others, absolutely.

And in all domestic abuse cases, sadly without any solid evidence of abuse, you’re probably not going to get very far.

Josie, His timing was not very good I agree.

Joe- absolutely men can be abused, my ex was often the target of his ex-gf’s bipolar-induced rage…however, this timing and the sensationalism of the alleged abuse against his wife just smells to me…

I just re-read the thread, Mpls Joe, and I’m not seeing where anyone commented that woman on man abuse is non-existent or even rare. The serious comments indicate that this is simply very convenient timing on Olsen’s behalf, and they called bullshit in re the timing.

Of course, this totally points to me as a single person of the 21st century and all but…

Why would anyone put up with that crap? I think if someone told me my taste in shirts is lousy, I would be out of there. I may be a bit Seinfeldian in that regard. Who eats peas one at a time? There is no way I would stand for that! Perhaps it is just me…

If he is using it as a convenient defense, then that does an incredible disservice to all the men who actually are abused, and that is really irresponsible.

Women often don’t leave abusive relationships. Maybe the same rationalization is done by men.

I think the people that stay in abusive relationships believe, for whatever reason, that they’re getting what they deserve, and that makes me sad. I was brought up to believe that if he hits, you walk, because no relationship is worth that.

I worked with a girl in college who left her fiance that she had been with for something like five years because he slapped her once in an argument, and it scared the bejesus out of her (rightfully so). I was really impressed – she stuck to her guns and didn’t cave, no matter how many times he apologized. I wish more men and women would be like that.

I stayed in an emotionally abusive relationship because I was very young at the time and thought that he was just a mean drunk…turns out he was both mean sober and drunk, but he just used drinking as an excuse. I was also afraid of not having a boyfriend and being alone forever. There are many reasons women stay, fear of being alone, raising children alone, low self esteem, etc. I’d rather focus on reasons women leave those types of relationships, it’s much more proactive and not as defeatist…

I imagine that the fear of the consequences of leaving are always very front and center is sticking in an abusive relationship. I mean, how many murders have we had this year in the Twin Cities by a jealous/abusive person killing their partner? Several, at least. Would I rather be abused and living or free and a target for death? That’s rationalization.

The problem is that there’s help often close by.

Don’t forget the religious aspect as well. It makes an appearance in the last paragraph of the linked article:

“Clark said that Olson told police that because of his religious beliefs – being the head of the household – that he was responsible for things that went wrong in the home, not that he committed any wrongdoing.”

Speaking of convenient juxtapositions, that “religious” justification for insecure men controlling low self-esteem women disgusts me, and I find it wholly incomprehensible in the 21st century. Freaking pathetic Promise Keepers. Christ, why not keep a couple of slaves while you’re at it.

that “religious” justification for insecure men controlling low self-esteem women disgusts me, and I find it wholly incomprehensible in the 21st century.

Wacth out with that kind of thought – Jihad will get you. Just something to consider next time you notice BurakGal is walking 10 feet behind her husband.

Jihads-n-slave masters can kiss my secular ass!

Feeling feisty tonight, bitches.

Mark has a history of abusing state legislative staff and
skipping the “anger management” class.

This blame the victim ploy is not so believable as his
personal relationship with a man-battering Christ.

I’ve always had a lot of respect for attorney Jill Clark and was quite surprised that she took on this case (How could she defend a Republican?). She started out by representing women who had faced discrimination/(sexual) harrassment in the workplace. I mostly know her for defending survivors of police brutality cases. This seems like quite a departure for her, but I’ve never known Jill to lose a court case. She typically does not publicize information that will work to her client’s favour, which may explain the timing of the battered husband defense. Jill only cares about justice, regardless of the person or the situation. There’s something that we can learn from here.