Secrets of the City

I read this yesterday in the paper, and I laughed my ass off. She thinks that noone in MN has sex in public? Well, maybe if you’re a part of the Walter Mondale set. Christ, you would think people have more important things to bitch about, like the weather. The whole article took on that scolding tone, like Alexis swore in front of her mother or something. And I suspect that probably only about 10 people bitched about it, but you know the old saying…”sex sells”…whether you’re praising it or raising a scornful eyebrow at it.

Well, maybe if you’re a part of the Walter Mondale set.

uh, bad example.

the alexis article was lazy and not very good, but christ, Kate Perry’s piece just left me feeling embarrassed for her.

I thought the Alexis article was exactly what vita.mn is supposed to be about (for better or worse). It started with a question online, used reader comment for the print article, and was written in a breezy style.

I mentioned on Alexis’ blog: I don’t understand Kate Parry’s beef. Is it the linking to the front page of the “venerable” Strib? I agree, that was maybe unwise. But then she goes on to argue that Minnesotans don’t have sex outdoors— based on anecdotal evidence — the same thing she criticized Alexis for.

Considering there’s no stats on public sex… I’m not sure anyone could do a “journalistic” story on the topic.

Story should have been about whomever is putting vita.mn entertainment pieces on the front page off the Star Tribune.

The “complaint,” as far as I see it, is Star Tribune readers expecting Star Tribune content and getting vita.mn content instead.

So therefore we tear Alexis apart? I don’t care how great or how poor Alexis’ piece was, it just seems like Alexis was the wrong target for Parry’s criticism. Target whomever is putting (the rare) original vita.mn stories on startribune.com.

Well, maybe if you’re a part of the Walter Mondale set.

uh, bad example.

I bet it all depends on which part of the Mondale set you are….

agreed derush.

parry was pandering.

And, it’s disappointing that Kate Parry’s “blog” still doesn’t have her Sunday column posted or at least a discussion topic for it. You go after an online component of your organization, you’d think there’d be an online discussion in the OmBlog.

*making a “W” with my fingers*

Parry’s column needed a good re-write. Was she taking issue with the assertion that people have sex in public (which alexis clearly said was not based on scientific study, so what is she going to argue with?) or that it was linked to from startribune.com? Pick one or the other. Two-pronged columns annoy the bejesus out of me.

As much as I hate to defend Alexis, this is pretty stupid.

Kate went after Alexis when she should have gone after the naughty strib story linker.

Alexis wrote her article (entertainment, not hard news) for Vita.mn. It was a Stribber that thought it appropriate to link the story to startribune.com.

Maybe they’re so used to the regurgitated Strib stories on Vita.mn that they don’t even notice the new stuff.

Is the this the time to revisit Alexis’ meth recipe incident?

The “breezy” anal sex column

“Entertainment reporter”?

The discussion of journalistic standards by the scrambling Ms. Barnes was hilarious.

Paging Avista – your real estate deal is ready.

This article nicely sums up why I don’t read vita.mn, but yeah, the front page link is an editor’s issue, not the writer’s. They hired someone who blogs about boys, clothes, and booze, then plastered her picture on a gazillion billboards, and now they are trying to figure out what standard her writing should be held to? Silly, bad management.

I was really surprised that the outdoor sex story was linked on the front page of the Strib; even to a freewheelin’ twenty-something like myself, that seemed inappropriate. But someone let it slip through to the website; where is their public scolding? It seems counterproductive to take Alexis to task for writing a story that was appropriate for its original venue.

I feel a little embarrassed for Kate Parry and the way she broadcast her own sexual neuroses to the Star Tribune’s readership. I guess she can at least take comfort that it’s a much smaller readership than it used to be.

Silly, bad management.

You expect any different from the strib nowdays?

True, Wayne, true.

This disconnect is pretty amazing. Makes me not-terribly-nostalgic for my time in Corporate America.

Ron – I work with a local advertising agency. The Star Tribune circulation is 631,322 vs. 676,322 last year. The newspaper is hardly irrelent with those numbers. And then you have to add the online component. It is still the #1 media in Minnesota by far.

We are seeing even more signifcant drop in local radio and broadcast ratings. Cable is OK, but is at best flat. We have pulled all our clients from the yellow pages. Who looks up the yellow pages when you can simply pull their website up.

ALL of media is changing. I suggest you do your homework….

I’m pretty sick of my time in corporate america right about now.

“Does ‘family newspaper’ mean anything anymore?”

Notice that we always have to scale back racy content for the sake of the family, not the prudish inclinations of the plaintiff. It’s not like kids read the paper, in print or otherwise, anyway — and at the very least, those that do are actually reading.

And y’know, some newspapers have slogans like “all the news fit to print”, but apparently someone’s decided that the Star and Tribune merged to form “Minnesota’s Family Newspaper” — it’s right there on the… err… wait… no… I can’t find it.

And there’s the Minnesota Monitor piece as well.

This whole forced “controversy” feels like either the Strib is trying to drum up some readership for Vita.mn or that they will cater to a few stodgy old coots who are deathly afraid of someone writing about s-e-x and having a link appear on a newspaper website. So much for product synergy if we let the geritol generation win.

1) No way should that article have been linked from the front page of the Star Tribune. Bad call, STrib computer nerds!

2) Were any of you part of Alexis’s survey? If so, please ‘fess up to your escapades.

3) I think this points to future tension between the Strib and vita.mn.

4) While I think it’s pretty cool that Alexis is being promoted this way, I was not impressed with her article. All the anonymous comments (and the reference to Alexis’s boss’s restaurant) were problematic, IMHO.

5) I think it’s pretty obvious this is about driving more readers to the site.

my outdoor sexcapades were all back east. it’s been a dry couple years out in the midwest for me.

This whole forced “controversy” feels like either the Strib is trying to drum up some readership for Vita.mn or that they will cater to a few stodgy old coots who are deathly afraid of someone writing about s-e-x and having a link appear on a newspaper website. So much for product synergy if we let the geritol generation win.

Kate Parry is the reader rep so there had to have been enough noise for her to address it in her column. She could have used As far as the Strib website users being “the geritol generation” my guess is that they would take offense as the average age is 36ish… hardly geriatric.

All of this “StarTribune is dying” is crap – fewer print readers than in the past? Absolutely, but the strib websites boasts numbers that the printed version only dreamed of. Strib is not going anywhere, folks.

… well, unless Avista decides to break the Strib up into peices and sell them off.

Hey! Those are my mom’s dishes! What are they doing in a thread about fucking in public? Sweet tempest, at any rate.

Tempest in a teacup for 100.

(Someone says I put this in the wrong thread, so it’s rerun season, I guess.)

So I read in the Strib today (Sunday) the column about two people of whom I’ve never heard, having a back-and-forth about a book, I think, by some gay whore who was blowing some religious poohbah somewhere, and these two are sort of chortling about it back and forth, with comments like “I wanted some pictures”, and talking about how he was charging the same rates for blowing guys for too many years and should have raised his rates, and some other fairly seamy stuff.

And then, a few pages later, I read Nancy Barnes snottily tell us that Alexis’ article about the attraction of outdoor sex just didn’t rise to the demanding standards of real journalism that the Strib is all about.

No one else seems to be reading the Strib. I suppose it’d be unfair to expect Barnes to read it.

Alexis is a hack. How she managed to con anybody into paying her for this tripe is beyond me. A few dozen good reporters get sent packing to cut the budget, yet the Strib continues cutting checks for this bad college newspaper crap. She should stick to her ego-stroking blog.

And this has nothing to do with being a prude or having any opinion at all on who has sex outdoors. I don’t care. The article was complete pap and Parry is right to scoff at it.

She could have used As far as the Strib website users being

Wow is all I have to say. I don’t what that sentence was all about.

I’m torn between “ooo, so THAT’S what’s that key does!”, and “it’s never wise to quickly switch from real coffee to decaf.”

I think vita.mn has its niche. I think the Strib needs to decide what it wants strib.com’s relationship to vita.mn to be and stick with it. Don’t exploit it, and then divorce yourself from it when it becomes inconvenient.

Also, I think Alexis’ writing is appropriate for the niche that vita.mn seems to be looking to fill. If you don’t like it, that’s a whole ‘nother thing.

I hated buzz.mn initially. Don’t like it much more now. (Until the Lileks’ takeover, it mainly struck me as all the stuff that didn’t make the cut for the Strib.) And I go back and forth on vita.mn. But I applaud the Strib’s willingness to create (and support?) these two ventures.

Bobby b hit the nail on the head re: Withering Glance, aka “the gay chortling column”.

How they justify THAT excuse for “journalism” in a major daily is beyond any comprehension.

I wonder how many of the folk complaining about the link and saying the the Strib is a “family paper” allow their kids to watch MTV, etc and let them walk around scantily clad.

That, and apparently kids can have sex, they just can’t talk or read about it…

Gay panic is so funny.

I don’t want my kids reading her column. And not because of the sex but because it’s so crappy. Why not assign somebody with an original thought and a way with words to this beat? I’m more worried about the Strib’s need to dumb things down than Vita’s content.

Maybe this cute little controversy is all a ploy to show readers and advertisers that the Strib produces talked-about and controversial content (albeit in a niche pub). Regardless of where the content appeared, it seems as if some standards (always grabbing Vita.mn cover stories as pullouts on the strib website) need altering from time to time. But even doing that would be judged as hypocritical by some. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

Attributing this whole non-incident to some sort of marketing guile on the part of the Strib is giving them WAY too much credit…this is just a string of goof-ups that happened while nobody was around to mind the store, and enough of your grandparents called & wrote Parry that she couldn’t stay quiet.

Anyone else willing to pay $20 to see Parry and Alexis share a passionate kiss and make up in public?

Kate Parry rightly points out that Alexis makes a sweeping claim about Minnesotans — that they like to have sex outdoors — based on a ridiculously small sample size (about a dozen people, all of them either anonymous or friends with the author, which isn’t exactly representative of the population diversity). To make such a claim based on such flimsy evidence is bad journalism, and to mix it in with the regular reportage on the Strib’s website undercuts the credibility of the whole, which is why Nancy Barnes is so cheesed off.

Hey Booby_b!

You can read? I thought I all right-wing wingnuts just watched Fox ‘news’….whose ratings are also in decline I hear.

“I don’t want my kids reading her column. And not because of the sex but because it’s so crappy.“

But you’re gonna buy them copies of the Strib?

Your kids are gonna be confused people.

“Hey Booby_b!

You can read? I thought I all right-wing wingnuts just watched Fox ‘news’….whose ratings are also in decline I hear.“

Hmmm, let’s see . . . .

Doesn’t touch on the subject matter at all. Is punctuation-challenged. Thinks mis-spelling “bobby” as “booby” conveys something positive about the writer, or negative about me. Depends on ad hominem attack over substantive reasoning, and, as I don’t watch TV, bad ad hominem at that.

Yeah, I’m gonna be taking YOUR comments to heart.

The only thing one can be certain that all minnesotans enjoy is passive-agressively bitching about things.

Jeez, a lot of angst for what was pretty much a tongue-in-cheek (ahem) “trend” piece. I don’t think Alexis was saying, “Hey! Guess what? All Minnesotans like to have sex outdoors!” More like, “Hey! Guess what? Despite its prudish Lutheran reputation, there are Minnesotans who like to have sex outdoors!”

That said, Parry’s public slapdown of a writer was out of line. Her beef (again, ignore the double-entendre for the moment) is with the online editor who linked it to the front page of StarTribune.com, or it’s with the vita.mn editor who assigned/approved the story, or it’s with the Strib management who decided to launch a snarky, alt-weeklyesque product in order to draw a few more eyeballs that don’t need bifocals.

From here, it looks like Alexis did what she was hired to do. If Parry or her handful of stick-up-the-ass readers don’t like it, their complaints should be directed a bit higher up the food chain.

It is SEX Minnesota….get over it you prudes!

Attributing this whole non-incident to some sort of marketing guile on the part of the Strib is giving them WAY too much credit.

Amen to that.

I’m with bobby_b and bud jr. on their assessment of withering glance. what a waste of space
as for the original article that started this all, it was just snare-young-readers piffle that most young readers would turn their young noses up at. it was dumb but so was parry’s response
now if you young mnspeakers will excuse me, I’m off to squash a couple of ladybugs. stop having sex on my geraniums, you pervents! take it inside!

The only thing one can be certain that all minnesotans enjoy is passive-agressively bitching about things.

As opposed to just aggressively bitching about things?

Now THAT’s funny!

I aggressively bitch about everything. Minnesotans don’t like me because it’s not passive enough and I don’t wait for the things to leave the room first.

I happen to be a fan of unscientific polls. And hack writers. Kuddos Alexis.

Minnesotans don’t like me because it’s not passive enough and I don’t wait for the things to leave the room first.

And because you refer to people as things. You asshat.

Tsk Tsk, Kevin. The preferred term is “ass haberdasher.”

I’ve had sex outside in Minnesota. A lot. Take that, Kate.

(BTW, doesn’t she destroy her whole “scientific” argument by offering her own conjecture about the lack of outdoor sex? Anecdote is anecdote, and no one is the worse off if it’s labeled as such.)

Thanks, Max, “ass haberdasher” almost made me spit out a delicious mouthful of key lime pie.

Hee!

Does masturbating on the porch count?

I have too…but not with rex…

I have with rex.

I see this as an opportunity for a series of articles, written by Alexis, about the innapropriate places that Minnesotans have had sex. That would really ruffle some feathers, I bet…

All Alexis cares about is sounding hip. Trust me. She’s extremely self-obsessed, has little emotion or care for other people, and drops people from her life without hesitation or remorse if a better opportunity comes along. She’s fickle as hell and I wouldn’t take her advice with a shaker of salt.

Also: All the people from her “unscientific poll” are just friends of hers, I recognize a few names on that list. I’m betting some of Rex’s outside sex was with Alexis, and surprized she didn’t fit him in there somewhere. She does love name dropping.

In a box, with a fox
como park, by lex with rex

Methinks Alexis is hard pressed for an “inappropriate” place…

I know if I was to say whether or not I have or have not done “sex al fresco,” somehow my parents would find out, and I don’t think I could handle that.

I certainly have not in Minnesota.

The Bahamas are another story.

I would also like to point out that there is one place in particular I would like to have inappropriate outdoor conduct before I am so done with this city and ready to move away.

I will not, however, disclose where or how to get into said location after dark.

Well, one person’s inappropriate is another person’s Fellowship Hall…jus’ sayin’

Name-dropping Rex doesn’t carry the same cache that it used to.

” . . . and drops people from her life without hesitation or remorse . . .”

Ah.

Things are becoming clearer.

DP-Throat, maybe you could just address the subject of the story itself, and not use MnSpeak for anonymous personal attacks on Alexis.

Yeah, someone got stilted, apparently.

(And I’m totally has-been. For fucks sake, I’m leaving comments in a post about outdoor sex from 1200 miles away.)

I see this as an opportunity for a series of articles, written by Alexis, about the innapropriate places that Minnesotans have had sex.

I’m all for suggestions.

Almost made it on the deck last night. Then the damn neighbor decided to have a smoke. Foiled again!

Neighbors and cigarettes: The primary cause of lesbian bed death.

I thought I read an article in a magazine that it was Doritos and Ben and Jerry’s that caused it…

That was Savage Love about two weeks ago.

Ahh…thanks…

Also: All the people from her “unscientific poll” are just friends of hers, I recognize a few names on that list. I’m betting some of Rex’s outside sex was with Alexis, and surprized she didn’t fit him in there somewhere.
Head’s up – 12-year-old in the room: did this not make anyone else (other than wayne) giggle?

Someone’s bitter about not having her/his name dropped.

“That was Savage Love about two weeks ago.“

First, it shouldn’t take you two weeks to say something nice about it, and, second, this probably should have stayed private between the two of you anyway.

C’mon. Manner count.

I refuse to remain quiet about my savage love.

actually it didn’t make me giggle
or guffaw
or even chuckle

I thought I read an article in a magazine that it was Doritos and Ben and Jerry’s that caused it…

Oh, no. There will be no fat middle-aged lesbians here.

I do like the Haagen-Dazs, though. I think savage love is a satisfactory workout routine.

That’s what she said!

All Alexis cares about is sounding hip. Trust me. She’s extremely self-obsessed, has little emotion or care for other people, and drops people from her life without hesitation or remorse if a better opportunity comes along. She’s fickle as hell and I wouldn’t take her advice with a shaker of salt.

OMG! UR JUS A HATRZ CUZ I HAVE SEX AN U DONT!!!!111!!!

Grow up dude…

maybe a little chortle, though.

I think that one’s actually a girl. I’ve got a hunch on this one…

a delicious mouthful of key lime pie.

Ooh, where’d you get that?

Alie, me thinks me loves you now.

Scandelous!

mouthful of key lime pie

Is that a euphemism?

speaking of outdoor sex, here’s an all time great game show moment.

Bob Eubanks: OK…tell me girls…where is the weirdest place that you, personally, have ever gotten an urge to make whoopee?

misunderstanding contestant: “um…I don’t know…In the a$$???”

Bob Eubanks: “No, no…weirdest LOCATION.”

I’m so glad I’m done eating the (real, actual) delicious key lime pie or else I would have totally lost my appetite for it by now.

I remember back in the day on some website I frequented there were different kinds of ‘pie’ for different varieties of hot girls. It was like a ridiculous code, but I do believe key lime was one of the varieties.

I just can’t remember which ):

I think that one’s actually a girl. I’ve got a hunch on this one…

send her my way, then!

Kevin- get in line with the rest of my panting admirers…har har…

panty admirers?

panty admirers?

If I wore them…eek!

As long as photographers don’t follow you around taking pictures of you getting out of cars, more power to you.

STICK IT IN!

Dear god, if that ever happened, I would give permission for any one of you to kick me until I was dead…

Can we put this post back on course and have people list their outdoor sex experiences? Me: behind Triple Rock, behind The Turf…

is this how the infamous poop threads begin?

Alie, I’m over you now.

I don’t know, but if poop comes up in this context, I’m leaving.

This one’s headed to 120…

I was on the lake all day yesterday, and all I got was this lousy sunburn. Judging by Rex’s comment, I should have been next to a stinking dumpster.

Kevin- I’m crushed…

had some high school sex on como park golfcourse (many holes)

Yeah, me, too. But it wasn’t meant to be. Still, you know I’ve got nothing butt love for you.

And I do mean butt love.

I’m unclear on the rules of “public sex” in this context. Does, say, sex in a car parked in a public place count? In a bathroom in a public place, or perhaps at a house party? Are we talking literally outdoors, no walls of any kind surrounding you? Or is public sex when you do it in a place where you take the risk of being caught?

These details could change my answers.

If I wore them…eek!

huhwhahuh?!

although that’s perfect for outdoor sexcapades.

I was on the lake all day yesterday, and all I got was this lousy sunburn.

Let me rub some lotion on it?

</creepy>

weird…rex’s locations are the same as Kate Parry’s.

Yes Wayne, that is creepy.

And I do mean butt love.

Kevin, that made me laugh out loud…thnx, I needed that!

josie: I’m unclear on the rules of “public sex” in this context. Does, say, sex in a car parked in a public place count?

According to the cops who arrested Norm Coleman’s dad in the parking lot at Red’s Savoy . . . yes.

Snap! to Mike.

Also, Wayne, that’s like a baby step away from “it rubs the lotion on its skin.” Keep that in mind.

Oh, I hear much, much worse on a regular basis.

Also, Wayne, that’s like a baby step away from “it rubs the lotion on its skin.”

ahahaahahaha

multiple lolgasm

Honestly, if you’re going to use a line from Silence of the Lambs, you should try this: “You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste. Anyway, here’s my number – call me.” Then do that phone-pantomime thing with the fingers and mouth “call me” again, in an exaggerated fashion.

Personally, I eschew such cheap stunts as “lines”, but I hear that one does the business almost all the time. Everyone knows that the ladies love cheap lines. You’ll win extra points with them if the shoes are actually Manolo Blahnik or similar.

umm, trend journalist? lol.

If you want to compare that column to journalism ok but then you better evaluate it as a piece of journalism if you want to be taken seriously. The writing sucks no matter what you call it. The last thing real journalists at the strib or those recently downsized from same need is to have their work insulted by association to alexis mindspew by blogger fanbois.

Ask her who her “anonymous” source Tony the uptown photographer is. Couldn’t even be bothered to interview someone outside her family. Reminds me of someone writing for a high school paper and handing in their assignment late as usual and trying to seem newspaper-ish. How much are they paying for this stuff and why is it on the cover?

The real question is when is someone at strib gonna hold some people accountable for wasting their slim opportunity to get some mindshare for vita.mn on the ongoing half-assed attempt to create a local brand out of a C or D-list blogger.

I’d wager as soon as the real estate deal is done vita.mn won’t escape the attention of the “Eye” for long. All this alexis episode will have done is hasten its demise. I wonder if the website will survive, at least it’s not bleeding cash? Not that they nor she will really care. There’s always someone with a wallet needing to be emptied.

P.S. Is having softcore conversations with your cousin about his fucks ok in MN or just a little this side of creepysville?

First of all, bud jr., your assessment that just because a women dares to write about sex must mean she’s hard up for it, is, shall we say, predictable from someone like you.

My problem with Parry’s column is the same as some others mentioned…she didn’t stick to the point that it was Strib’s fuck-up to post the link on its’ homepage (causing the outrage in the first place) and that simply because Perry can’t imagine Minnesotans having sex outdoors, it must mean that it just doesn’t happen. Poor form all around. I personally enjoyed Alexis’ article, but I focused more on the entertaining content rather than nit-pick her sources, etc. That’s my bag. You can carry yours.

MNSpeak was better when Rex was behind the Turf Club.

I think that Parry was obligated to write it as the readers’ rep, and that’s pretty much it. It’s how papers work.

My guess is that you can find her and others on Hidden Beach next Saturday night if you want to engage in, uh, rebuttal. That’s right. Rebuttal.

Hey! Don’t get up in my grill. All I said was, “REBUTTAL.” Jeez…

I take that back…

What I really said was “cross examination.”

YEAH! Cross examination!

I mean “counterpuntal”…

My only disagreement with Alexis is that “the thrill of getting caught” is part of it, if what she means is the thrill of the risk of getting caught.

I agree…I do think she was obligated to write about it. Readers were upset. I just think the way she skewed her focus from the homepage link and the content of the article to an almost personal attack on Alexis was sore sight on her part.

Hidden Beach, huh? Rebuttal on Hidden Beach…what could I do with this one…what could I do?!

Oh alie, you know how to tug my heart strings with the kitties.

Kevin, that made me laugh out loud…thnx, I needed that!

Unfortunately…that’s what she said.

Alie, your kitty is so cute.

(The actual cat in the picture, guys, sheesh.)

Josie- thanks…she almost turned into emo kitteh due to possibly being rejected by Kevin…

And holy crap, this thread is reminding me how brilliant Silence of the Lambs is.

Seriously, she’s an adorable kitteh!

Emo kitteh still sad:

Cripes, I have two vodka tonics and I’m all about LOLcats.

I love that emo kitteh…sigh…

Don’t you just want to scoop up emo kitteh and squeeze her, possibly until she meows in discomfort? I wish my cat was still a kitten and would put up with that nonsense.

haha! Me too…

LOLcat = kitteh pr0n

Yeah, not digging the personal attack on alexis to make up for the huge oversight that the strib people made.

OMG SEX!!?!?! !!! MY CHILDREN MIGHT HEAR ABOUT SEX OH NOES!!!!! It’s actually pretty funny.

The other funny thing is they talk about journalistic integrity, like somehow the strib has any left right after gutting their newsroom. What a class act.

There’s nothing wrong with her article, it’s typical city rag fare, not supposed to be uptight and stiff like regular newspaper fare.

Emo kitteh melts my heart of stone.

Frankly, I don’t buy that she had a ton of complaints. In my experience, most people, no matter how uptight they seem, are perverted voyeurs that like reading stuff that tells them it’s natural to be perverted voyeurs…even if they won’t admit it.

I wish there was a way to inject the warm and cuddly feeling I get from emo kitteh directly into my veins for those times I don’t have internet access.

Uh, first of all, Amber, you missed my point.

I did not imply that NexisAlexisSexisLexis is in any way “hard up”.

I simply speculated that she was probably open to anything anytime anywhere.

BIG difference.

Now, back to the misty eyed kitties…..

You are certainly welcome to a reBUTTal.

Don’t you think you could at least try to be a gentleman, Bud?

Yeah! No shit!

I love emo kitteh and I don’t even like cats.

he’s the kind of guy that thinks every lady wants to blow him…

Actually, bud jr., I didn’t. To me it was still the same implication. She writes about sex, so therefore she must be gunning for it whenever she has the chance. The same way people took her column on anal sex to mean that it’s okay to pose puns about how she’d beg for some backdoor action. You said you speculated, thereby implying that you don’t know her, which means you should probably just shut your mouth, In any case, the comment was inappropriate, sexist, and ignorant.