Secrets of the City

Correct answer: they’re lazy and afraid.

Broken link.

That’s changing. In my neighborhood (early 1960s vintage), there are no sidewalks. However, there are sidewalks at a new development a few blocks away, and links to sidewalks and paved trails in several small city parks. Mr. B. and me can be found walking there whenever weather permits. Also, whenever major road construction is done, an off-road sidewalk and/or bike trail is added.

So there, smarmy urbanites (you know who you are).

The absence of a sidewalk shouldn’t be an obstacle to walking on sweeping lanes and cul-de-sacs. Thinking of the homes and lots in New Suburbia, there is plenty of private, sheltered outdoor space for the kids to play in, and enough dead space in the house itself to run a small YMCA. If there is anything that would make walking through the suburb difficult, it would be the lack of anything interesting to do. Can you really get excited for a brisk two-minute stroll around the retaining pool “lake”?

Sidewalks are a mixed blessing. They break up and you gotta pay through the nose to have them fixed. And you can’t control the people who walk on them. That. and the alley.

That said, The Rat prefers them over no sidewallks.

Broken link fixed. Mndude, the story was from four years ago. Try to keep up, eh? Now, I’m going out to take a walk on the sidewalk in my city neighborhood.

Recent studies show that you get where you’re going faster if you drive.

but you might die faster as well..

I think some suburbs are more walk-friendly that others. Eden Prairie and St Louis Park have a nice set of sidewalks and trails to get around town.

Can you really get excited for a brisk two-minute stroll around the retaining pool “lake”?

As that retaining pool lake is planted in native species, attracts a wide variety of waterfowl, and is surrounded by a diverse new neighborhood, yes, I can.

Besides, Mr. B likes to pee on the Big Bluestem

This story is old news.

Recent studies show that you get where you’re going faster if you drive.

You’re in greater danger as well. They did a study in a couple cities, I think Portland was one, and found that people who moved to the suburbs may have experienced less crime, but they increased their likelihood of dying on the roads.

So what’s a guy to do?

Kevin, at least USAT doesn’t expire its stories like the Strib does. Otherwise, I would have linked to the Strib article where suburbanites complain about their “ponds” drying up.

That prairie grass was the inspiration for the grass dance that the northern tribes do. Growing to heights of 8 feet, much of the upper midwest was covered with it back in the day.

Hey, this story is four years old.

Walking is scary-you might meet someone you might not recognize. You can’t speed away at 70 mph or be protected by glass and steel. American culture is moving more and more into fear and the controlling of an experience. Restricting access and ease of movement are part of this. The most well known example of this fear/control being Disneyland. I live in a suburb that claims, in it’s “mission statement”, to be a “walkable” community, yet there are only two streets with sidewalks. When the newest of these sidewalks was put in there was active resistance based on having to shovel, increasing foot traffic (of god knows who!) walking past their house, etc.. I walk almost every evening in this and other neighborhoods and you rarely meet anyone. Half the time you meet someone, they appear to be fearful. Very few give a greeting and sometimes when you do, they pretend they don’t hear.

You need a hand signal. A suburban solidarity gesture.

Something that says “I’m in with ya’”

It is still inspiring little Beagle-Jack dogs today, maz.

There is a nice display of Big Bluestem (aka “Turkey Foot”) here which shows its remarkable root system that held the soil together, recovered quickly from grass fires and helped the plant survive drought and grazing by buffalo.

I usually throw my suburban gang sign, which I picked up when I moved into one of Detroits’ grittier ‘hoods…place your hands parallell to the floor @ your belly button, one palm up & one palm down so that the palms are facing each other with fingers pointed in opposite directions. curl your fingers inward so that the fingertips from both hands are touching…you’ll see that your hands form an “S”…at this point you should utter “reprazentin the suburbs, G”. Trust me, it’s a fun party trick to show your stiff white friends. If someone throws one of these back in your face, run & duck for cover

Another thing they didn’t cover here is “going for a walk” vs. walking somewhere. Going for a walk means just walking around in a 1-mile circle for recreation; very popular with my dad out in the suburbs. But he would never think of walking to the grocery store or to a restaurant. Seems like a lot of city walking is just to go somewhere.

Life expectancy is at an all-time high, nearly 78 years. Aren’t we healthy enough?

I hate hate hate when they “expire” stories. It’s 2007, leave things on the Internets forever already.

You need a hand signal. A suburban solidarity gesture.

Something that says “I’m in with ya’”

Yeah, like that scene in Stir Crazy with Gene Wilder and Richard Prior, where they’re pimp strollin by the prison cells, saying “We bad, we bad.” heh

There is something pathetic about a self-absorbed people who are so obsessed with health and safety. I knew I didn’t like where it was heading when people started carrying around bottled water. (Oh, credit for that reference should go to george carlin, I suppose. ok? sheesh)

I was recently working with a hospice group, and they told me that the number one regret of folks who are in hospice care is that they feel like they didn’t take enough risks in life.

It gave me an epiphany…why don’t we offer these elderly dull suburban folks high-risk adventure tours so that they go out with a bang…stuff like safari lion-hunting with knives, hand feeding great whites the South Australia coast, swimming with the seals in murky river mouths in No. Cal, free climbing Everest, rappeling into volcanoes.

For slightly more money than it would cost to have a nice funeral & burial plot, they can go on a (literally) once in a lifetime adventure….whether they live or die, they’ll no longer regret avoiding risk.

I bottle my own (tap) water. And reuse the bottle. It’s a lot cheaper and essentially the same water anyway.

And yeah, all those people being paranoid about our safety. Go USA Patriot Act!
Or is that totally different, maz?

They probably worked for the government, too.

Aren’t we healthy enough?

If you call being on dialysis, insulin, having a foot amputated, being confined to a nursing home bed, and being a financial strain on your children, yourself, and the taxpayer living, I guess so.

they go out with a bang…stuff like safari lion-hunting with knives, hand feeding great whites the South Australia coast, swimming with the seals in murky river mouths in No. Cal, free climbing Everest, rappeling into volcanoes.

Or a ride on the Number 35

If Tom doesn’t get my sarcasm anymore… clearly there’s trouble on this site. Or my sarcasm sucks. One of the two.

Yeah, Jason, the actual quality of life for people who live a really long time is usually pretty crappy, but they keep on truckin’ thanks to modern medicine.

oh

nevermind

We put our family cabin in a LLC a few years ago to protect it from the government if one of my parents need to go into a long term care facility. They are both in generally good health but are both in their mid 70’s so who knows what could happen.

Or movie passes to Block E

Dinner afterwards at the Hooter’s restaurant.

Rat…I see where you’re coming from, but there would still be a body to dispose of with expenses. I’m talking about the full package.

Hooter’s has caused many a heart attack. And not just because of the wings.

did you guys know that the Block E Hooters has a specialty of the house that isn’t on the menu…cottage cheese.

You walk by the Hooters and there’s always families in there.

G rote should take note, as per a previous discussion.

We put our family cabin in a LLC a few years ago to protect it from the government if one of my parents need to go into a long term care facility.

I thought only republicans did that.

Nope just people that are smart enough to know.

There are a couple of mindsets. (Not necessarily Suburbia v Urban) One is that you go to the gym to exercise. You drive to the lake and walk around it for exercise. You hit the bike trail for exercise. Etc.

The other is you bike to work and get a bonus of exercise. You walk to the grocery store and get a bonus of exercise. Exercise does not have to be an extra time eating activity. It can be part of your regular activity. Why do I walk to the grocery store? For the bonus exercise. It isn’t that far (Maybe a mile), and it isn’t any extra trouble.

I think most Americans have had the first mind set. However, more and more are coming around to the second. There just isn’t enough hours in the day to fit in a trip to the gym…

I went into a Hooters once on a bidness trip to Phoenix. Just out of curiosity, of course. I hated the fact that I had to consciously keep my gaze on the young woman’s face and never let it drop so as to not be thought a perv. Too much work for a standard burger and fries meal, I thought.

Hooters, meh…my son prefers the buffet @ Rick’s Cabaret.

It’s not just a buffet, but and International Buffett.

Only seen the sign, honest.

we refer to it as “legs & eggs”

I recently moved less than a mile from my office, and I’ve started walking to work every day. Today I noticed I was going faster then the bus that I could theoretically take to work…yet I seem to be the only person walking down Nicollet with the “I’m-going-somewhere” sense of purpose.

It’s a really nice way to start the day, it only takes fifteen minutes, and I’m not getting screwed over by the costs of parking in downtown. It’s a beautiful thing. That said, I’m not looking forward to the winter.

There is something pathetic about a self-absorbed people who are so obsessed with health and safety. I knew I didn’t like where it was heading when people started carrying around bottled water. (Oh, credit for that reference should go to george carlin, I suppose. ok? sheesh)

For someone who doesn’t smoke or drink, you seem oddly dismissive of other people’s health choices.

I walk back and forth to work almost every day. 1.8 miles each way. I love it.

There’s also a nice walking and biking path that goes along the Mississippi starting downtown. I’m trying to get in the habit of walking it each weekend. It’s crazy long — like, 10 miles.

We put our family cabin in a LLC a few years ago to protect it from the government if one of my parents need to go into a long term care facility. They are both in generally good health but are both in their mid 70’s so who knows what could happen.

I’m sorry, but I can’t resist. Protect it from the government? As in, government would take it or require them to sell it before giving your parents long-term care benefits? I’m not trying to pick on you specifically because I don’t know your situation. Just in general. Hopefully the people of my generation realize that planning for old age needs to start long before “a few years ago”. Maybe you did, again, not picking on you specifically. But our population is aging and health care costs are already growing at an unsustainable rate for the government. If people think they can just wait around and government will take care of them when they’re all wrinkled and broken, they’re going to bankrupt our state/nation or saddle today’s younger generations (read: me) with tax rates beyond comprehension to pay for it all. So start planning, people. Or else don’t get pissed when we (read: I) get pissed that government is paying to sustain people with assets like recreational cabins, or – to stay on topic – suburban mansions.

Conservatives will tell you that health has become the new religion of the left.That’s oddly dismissive, too. I wonder if they’d ever consider business and commerce the religion of the right?

As if people should say, “aw, the hell with health.”

Contrary to the habits of most people here, I don’t think being a non-smoker or a non-driner is all that unusual. My point is with the inordinate degree of concern for health and safety with people whose youth and the natural vigor that comes with it, would naturally show. I was a long distance runner before long distance running was cool. I used to run 4-5 miles a day without breaking a sweat. It’s a cultural thing. But when my knees got old, I stopped. That’s life.

Not be a drinker may be unusual, but, man do I find the thought depressing.

“Yeah I was totally into that before it was cool. Then it sold out and I lost interest.”

Yay for people walking to work! I live about 1/3 of a mile from my office and walk to work every day too. I can actually see my apartment from one of the few windows in the building, although I can’t quite see my office out my apartment windows because it’s a weird angle.

There’s also a nice walking and biking path that goes along the Mississippi starting downtown. I’m trying to get in the habit of walking it each weekend. It’s crazy long — like, 10 miles.

Do you mean the W. River Parkway? I think it actually starts up around the north loop by Plymouth or Broadway somewhere, but yeah it’s hella long. There’s an E. River Parkway too that starts at the U and goes forever and ever down the river. It might even go all the way to downtown St. Paul, but I’ve not made an attempt to take it that far yet.

“The automobile has not merely taken over the street, it has dissolved the living tissue of the city. Its appetite for space is absolutely insatiable; moving and parked, it devours urban land, leaving the buildings as mere islands of habitable space in a sea of dangerous and ugly traffic.”–James Marston Fitch, New York Times, May 1, 1960

“People are broad-minded. They’ll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn’t drive, there’s something wrong with him.” – Art Buchwald

The Rat’s mother doesn’t drive. He always wondered what the talk around town was about her.

Small town gossip being what it is.

why don’t we offer these elderly dull suburban folks high-risk adventure tours so that they go out with a bang

Bill Hicks suggested that they do stunts for movies. Something about grandma meeting Chuck Norris, then having her head roundhouse-kicked off.

Thank you, Tate.

But our population is aging and health care costs are already growing at an unsustainable rate for the government.

So how do you plan when the company that promised you a pension is severely underfunding it and when you retire there is no money for anyone?

And as to Maz’s point, rich people have been using these financial tools for decades to protect their money from estate taxes. So we are bad because we want to protect our family cabin worth $100,000 while people protecting millions are fine? You obviously don’t really have a very good sense of prospective since your parents bought your condo.

That must be why they insist on stashing all six family members there when they come to visit. That’s only 129 square feet per person – and one of them is my 16-year-old sister who can’t travel without 4,500 bags.

That’s a lot of bags.

We live in the middle of DOWNTOWN St. Paul – and our work, groceries and friends are still too far to walk to. I’m all for walking, but I frankly don’t have time to take the hour + to hoof it to the places I need to get to from home. So take that, ya urban pedestrian city planning freaks. I bet we drive more than some suburban people.

You want urban pedestrian utopia bullshit, then move to EUROPE.

Amen sister. or is it brother. I forget.

Bx, living downtown in most reasonable cities with decent public transit is a wonderful thing where you can walk everywhere. The Twin Cities is not one of those places.

I think both paths along the river end at the Ford Plant in St Paul. That is, the lock and dam there. That is a stretch of my biking route to work. East River road to work, and West River Road back.

Amen to wayne.

I think our public transport system in the city core is decent. I take it all over the place and the busses run all hours of day and are not that bad at all.

Could we improve? Yes. Is it terrible? No, it is decent.

I would like to see some bus route maps on the stops please.

I’d like to see more stops with:

1) shelters- it gets cold here! at least something to shield the wind, if not heat lamps! these are way too rare.
2) route identifiers- for some reason they think it’s ok to only post which routes stop there on important routes at important stops. I know signage isn’t cheap, but it would be nice to know which route goes by when you’re in an unfamiliar part of town too.
3) schedules!- again, these are in even fewer places than route identifiers. What gives? They’re not just posted at timepoints, either, there’s some random places that have them and a lot of places that don’t.
4) maps- seriously, again, if I’m in a somewhat unfamiliar part of town and don’t know what bus comes by or where it goes (or when it comes by), how am I supposed to take the bus? This would probably cut down on a lot of people asking the driver if a bus goes somewhere and holding everyone up.
5) trolleys- come on! Can’t we get a real transit system around here?

Another thing they didn’t cover here is “going for a walk” vs. walking somewhere. Going for a walk means just walking around in a 1-mile circle for recreation; very popular with my dad out in the suburbs. But he would never think of walking to the grocery store or to a restaurant. Seems like a lot of city walking is just to go somewhere.

The Metropolitan Design Center at the University has done a fair amount of research into this very issue. See here.

I’d note, however, that in their research, none of the areas studied are what I’d call a truly urban neighborhood, like St. Anthony, Downtown MPLS, or even Whittier, where there truly are a lot of places to walk to. Sadly, downtown St. Paul, in spite of its density and appearance, doesn’t have the variety of uses to support this type of lifestyle.

They are having Metrotransit meetings with the public tomorrow and Wednesday. Stop on down and share your ideas!

public tomorrow and Wednesday. Stop on down and share

I totally read “pubic” and “shave.” I should maybe stop skimming.

I agree, it’s decent. You can always ask the driver for a system-wide map or just poke your head in the door and ask if he/she can take you to where you want to go. They are usually able to help. Or program MetroTransit into your cell phone and call if you get lost.

Or, if you get lucky, ask Ranty. She helped me once, back before I was kwatt and she was Ranty.

Bx, with a European-style commuter bike and some grocery bag panniers, you too can enjoy a slice of that “utopia[n] bullshit.”