Secrets Blog

Sinking The Titanic

When exactly did Lileks lose his mind? Today’s Backfence imagines the ability to go back in time and take one thing with you. Lileks chooses to go back to 1912 with a DVD player and a copy of Titanic. Wouldn’t Jesus love the iPod?


BlackBerry Soup At Nochee

Downtown in the Mill District’s Nochee, there’s a new strategy for heating up singles’ night: provide your customers with BlackBerrys and let text-messaging work its magic. Is this a dubious idea whose only value is as an attention-getting gimmick? Or is it a brilliant new way for drunk people to abuse communications technology? You tell us — when a recounting of our nights includes the phrase “vibrated seductively,” it means we were home alone.


Al Franken Move To… Nordeast?

Guess which news organization broke the news that Al Franken is moving back to town to kick start a potential 2008 run for the Senate? Nope, not the Strib. Nope, not those scrappers on the other side of the river. Yes, that’s right, it was Pulse of the Twin Cities.

Haha, gotcha! — it was actually Salon.com. The story says that after being away for three decades, Franken is moving back to Minneapolis with his radio show (and, completely burying the lead, presumably Katherine Lanpher). Salon reports that Franken will be getting an apartment in Minneapolis, and in the comments you can try to guess where.


This Is A Stick-up

No laughing matter here, folks. A group of armed gunmen have been prowling Uptown and robbing bar patrons as they walk down the street. Twelve robberies have been reported in the last 3 weeks, including one guy who was hit twice on the same night. “After the first robbery, he went home and got more cash, which the robbers promptly took a few hours later.” Yikes. I think I’ll stay up here in Northeast, where all the bartenders pack heat and I know they’ve got my back.


Heartspark Dollar-Whoops!

More reasons not to miss college. Everclear, aka “the most affordable and available alternative rock band” (ouch!) played the U of M’s Spring Jam last Saturday. One guy was so excited he ended up falling over a 20-foot high retaining wall. Perhaps it was karmic retribution for stomping this guy’s Pumas?